love to hate me -shuhua's pov //sooshu

chapter 3

shuhua hadn't planned it, it just happened

after she and soojin had finished at her house last friday, the blonde had kicked her out, shoving her as they went down the stairs for pinching one of her hips too hard

she complained that it would create a bruise, and shuhua thought it was a little unfair, since she had enjoyed the entire time they had sex

what happened next was something she couldn't be blamed for

it may or may not have been true that she had an obsession with being better than soojin in every way

and that was why at that moment, lying on her bed, in the dark, on a sunday evening, with her computer on her lap, she was staring at the homepage of a porn site

it was all soojin's fault, shuhua wasn't even one of those girls who watched porn, really, but ever since she came back from the girl's house a couple of weeks ago she had been dying to do it

one of the reasons she wanted to do it was that soojin seemed to know things about the subject that she didn't and it made her feel like a virgin

and she was one hundred percent sure that the blonde had experiences alone most of the time and she completely refused to have a lower level of knowledge than her

imagine being worse than soojin in bed, god no!

she came home that day, muttering about how she didn't understand how soojin had more than one strap-on in the house and how she knew how to use them or even how to attach them.

by the way, shuhua was her first time, right?
why did she have all those gadgets in her room?
she almost didn't feel nauseous thinking about it

she was determined to surpass her in knowledge and experience, so she took courage and waited until everyone in the house was asleep

truth be told, much of what she was seeing scared her to death

most of the videos were "girl gets educated by stepmom" and then there were lots of short videos of people holding their partner bent over, using embarrassing sex toys and slapping each other

she felt almost subdued by those images and blinked quickly against the light

she thanks god for a moment (realizing it was inappropriate only later) that the blonde hadn't yet expressed any kind of interest in that kind of thing

the truth was that she was freaking out, because she didn't imagine people doing that kind of thing, and because she, on the other hand, didn't have any kind of experience

did soojin expect her to hold her down and blindfold her?

the idea seemed unpleasant to her, but she was happy to be the girl's first

she couldn't have that much experience compared to her, come on

it had only been a few weeks since the first time

she left the page determined to find another one, somewhere there must have been videos with normal people and not famous porn stars with huge breasts who emitt submissive moans

she finally found an amateur video of what she thought was a couple, not much older than her, which she found very reassuring

the light in the video room was dim, but the subjects were quite visible

the girl in the foreground had brown hair and was lying on the bed, being kissed by another girl with dark red hair sitting astride her, with her knees on either side of her ribs

the brunette underneath her groped the other's ass, which wasn't bad, it reminded her of soojin's

the couple rolled over and before shuhua understood what was happening, the girl on top got on top of the other, placing a hand on the red-haired girl's thighs