Your Hands Are Warm (A DaveSport Fic)

CH4 - Vegas

Jack POV

LONG CHAPTER WARNING!!!!!!!

"Sportsy, we're 3 hours away from Vegas! YIPPEE!" Dave shouted in excitement, maintaining his wide grin. "Man, I sure hope we won't gamble our life savings away. That would be unfortunate." I sighed. Dave simply chuckled at my response, before going silent, focusing on driving. I wonder where he got this Honda Civic from? It looks stolen...

[Upon arrival in Vegas]

"Woah, this place is cool, I guess. Why are we here anyways, again?" I acknowledged. "V E G A S ." Dave replied in pure ecstasy, completely ignoring my question. Wow, thanks. I have a feeling he snorted too much of that good shit. Reader, keep in mind I killed kids for this. "Sportsy, let's go check this out! Seems like a nice pub." Dave pointed out a shady looking bar across the street. "I don't think that's a good idea, we'll be completely wasted." I advised. "Yeah, no shit. That's the whole point, Sportsy!" Dave chuckled. Wow. This guy really is something else. And even so, I can't help but hang out with him. For Dee, for Peter.

We walked across the road to the pub. Listen man, if it all ends here, I don't even fucking care anymore. I haven't taken my meds the past 2 days, I'm totally out of it, dude. As soon as we entered the place, my nostrils got filled with an awful reek of alcohol and cigarettes. "Come on, sit down with me, Old Sport!" Dave ran ahead, sitting on a barstool and patting the one next to him, signaling for me to sit. I sighed and sat next to him. "Hey. What can I get ya?" offered the bartender politely. "Nothing, thank you." I declined respectfully. Dave looked at me judgmentally, "Ya like vodka or whiskey more?" He asked. I- "Whiskey, I guess..." I said, before I got interrupte- "Well there you have it! A shot of vodka and whiskey, big man." Dave ordered the bartender.

"What're you doing, Dave? We're gonna get completely fucking smashed and there will be nobody to walk us to a motel, or something!" I whispered to Dave angrily. "And? As long as we can walk, we'll find our way. I'm pretty used to alcohol, Old Sport, we'll be fine!"

[An entire whiskey bottle later]

"Ughhhh.... I- *hic* thenk ive hath enouh" hjbm gvncxc fgvhbnm cxdfgh "What's wrong, Old Sport? Not used to alcohol?" nhbgcv bnhjhgnfb vnmjmj nhgbfvc. "I'm it drunso I'm de, inely de, insansank" ias *THUMP* "Oh shit, Sportsy got knocked out. Lol."

Everything went dark. To be, or not to be. That is the question. I may or may not have drank a tad bit too much. Tomorrow is another day.

"Hey, Old Sport, you alright?" I felt someone tap my shoulder. "Mmnpggghhhph?" I tried replying. "Come on, let's get ya to bed." The voice continued. "ppffhhhmbb.." I was too drunk to recognize who that was, but they supported me by the shoulder and started walking somewhere... Welp, might get kidnapped right here and right now. Unless.. Oh, might be Dave, actually. Get me to bed? We're far from home, though, what does he mean, bed?

I finally started perceiving what was going on around me. It was already pitch black outside. Hm, peculiar. "Wow, you're really out of it, Sportsy. Didn't know you were this sensitive to alcohol." Dave laughed. "Mmmmnnnpgghh...*hic*" Ah, yes. Very comprehensible direct speech. Good luck, reader.

We got to a building with a large neon sign reading MOTEL. I wonder if this is a motel? "Dahewree D,re wheah?" I asked, very legibly. "Sure...?" Dave replied. That's... Not a yes or no question. He sat me down in a chair while he talked to someone for a while, before picking me up again. "O cen welk un my uwn. Am net o chald!" I protested. "Yeah, unga bunga, bitch." Dave misunderstood again. "stuckung aet yaer gyitt far tho ruzzlor yaero sa skubudu yaero sa finem tix u jest winni bo yaer sugmi" I started singing sea shanties cutely. "You might be suffering a minor case of serious brain damage, Sportsy." He said in a bri'ish accent. I wonder what he's referencing? (yes portal fans still exist)