soukoku oneshots

Partners

“Chuuya, why are you crying?” Dazai asked gently, brushing Chuuya's hair away from his forehead. He had a serene expression on his face, not the one that expressed comfort, no.

It was the expression of someone who had surpassed insanity and Chuuya felt fucking terrified. His hands were bonded, mouth gagged and Dazai had a firm grip on his neck to nullify his ability.

“We love each other right?” Dazai asked as he hugged him close. “Am so glad you love me.”

Chuuya was too weak to thrash around, all his power was drained out. He just let out a sob, hoping his muffled pleas could snap Dazai out of his maniac trance. But he didn't seem to stop.

“Dazai . . .” Chuuya whimpered into the gag.

“Stop.”

“We will forever be together I promise.” Dazai cooed, clicking the bullet into place. “Nothing can pull us apart.”

“Stop!”

The barrel felt cold against Chuuya's forehead, he stopped resisting, cold fear making him go numb and motionless. Dazai kissed his cheek, giggling like it was all a joke.

“You're happy right? I'm really happy.” Dazai whispered against Chuuya's ear, his breath feeling cold against Chuuya's skin. He shivered.

“I love you.” Dazai said as he pulled the trigger.
.
.
.
.

Chuuya woke up with a jolt, his hand immediately reaching out for his temple. Nothing. Dream, it was all a dream. He rolled over the bed and pressed his palms on his eyes, feeling the skin getting wet from the tear.

His whole body was shivering despite being covered in sweat, all because he was scared and internally shaken.

“Chuuya-san, you alright?”

Akutagawa poked his head through the door, his face was devoid of any expression but his voice had an underlying worry.

“I heard you screaming.”

“I'm fine.” Chuuya said as he pushed the blankets away and got off the bed, his legs felt weak under his weight. He stumbled as he put his slippers on, head dizzy and nauseous knocking him over.

Akutagawa let out a sound of disapproval. “Please stay in bed, you're sick.”

“I'm fine.” Chuuya answered as he put a jacket on. “I'm going out.”
“This time of night?”
“Yes.”
“It's snowing.”
“Don't care.”
Akutagawa sighed and stepped away from the door, giving Chuuya a pat on his back as he left the room. Chuuya could feel his stare as he left the corridor, racing down the stairs and pushing past the night guards to get out of the building. Out, he desperately wanted to go out. His head felt heavy and stuffed, his spine hurt and body burning from fever; despite that he wanted to get out and go somewhere. He felt scared, he wanted to get rid of that feeling somehow.

He hated feeling that way, it reminded him of the time in the government faculty. All the soldiers and doctors, all of them poking and hurting him without an explanation; watching him from behind a glass wall and doing all sorts of things to him. Chuuya was scared.
It reminded him of the time his friends left him. It reminded him of the time Dazai left him, alone in the port mafia. Dazai, he wanted Dazai.
The snow piled up to his ankles, soaking his pajamas wet. He couldn't even use his ability. Akutagawa was right, Chuuya should have just stayed in the bed. But it was too cold and too big, he needed warmth.