What's Said in Silence

Sera-XXXXXII

"Ten minutes lads and lady." III yelled over the music. We were back home just in time for New Year's Eve and the boys had insisted we all do a get-together. Mostly, it consisted of III and IV fighting over who had control of the music and II drinking more Red Bull than alcohol. I had baked a few sweets but Vessel had insisted we take the easy route and just order a pizza for the main course. No one else seemed to protest so I wouldn't either. 

The countdown played on the T.V. and I couldn't help but think about the whirlwind of a year this had been. I'm sure everyone else in the world thought the same, but I felt my circumstance was... unconventional to say the least. There was still a lot of evil lurking in dark corners, but I tried not to let myself focus on that. Rather, I decided to count how many times Vessel came up with an excuse to touch me in some way tonight. 

Placing his hand on the small of my back to slide past me: 17.

"Who's kissing who when the ball drops?" III asked no one in particular. 

"Well the one lady is taken so I guess I'm stuck kissing you." IV responded.

"I'm good on the kisses." II chimed in, taking another sip of his energy drink. I had to wonder how he got any sleep after consuming that much caffeine. Their banter was always amusing and it nearly made me grin, until something sank in. I looked over to Vessel and he looked at me confirming he'd heard the same thing I had. 

The one lady is taken.

"Oh, c'mon. You guys aren't exactly subtle about it." IV said, confirming that they knew about mine and Vessels... relationship? I still didn't know what to call it but I had to wonder when they figured it out.

"Right, like two magnets in the same room." III piped up, and heat flushed across my cheeks. From an outsiders point of view, I sounded so clingy. Then again, not all the blame was mine.

"Don't get me started about Scotland," II added in, gaining everyone's attention before he let out a sentence that would haunt me the rest of my life. "Wrong time to walk past the library."

"Alright, that's enough." Vessels stern voice cut through the eruption of laughter. I was sure all the color had drained from my face and I wanted nothing more than to crawl into a hole. If the library wasn't a secret, then neither was the pool house. Luckily, no one mentioned it out of decency. 

"Point is mate, there's no use in trying to hide it. We know." II said, his smirk meeting the edge of his rolled up mask. Vessels hand instinctively reached for mine, threading his fingers between my own. 

"Then I won't." He muttered under his breath. The message was more intended for me than for anyone else in the room. I gave his hand a gentle squeeze. There were things that still needed to be sorted out between us, more on my end than his, but for right now, we were undeniably, unabashedly us. 

I looked towards the T.V. again, there were five minutes left until the new year began. I found myself blank with any new years resolutions. There were plenty of flaws about me that I could fix, but none came to my mind. The only thing I saw in the upcoming year was him. I turned my attention back to the man beside me. So badly, I wanted my year to be filled with him. His smile, his laugh, his voice, his touch, his everything. 

I didn't care if he ever showed me what was behind the mask, because this entire time I'd gotten to know the real him. What lies beneath was irrelevant. This man had pulled me so far beneath his tidal waves and I'd gladly hold my breath forever, if only I could bury my history deeper. 

I shook myself from the regretful solace as III gave out the one minute warning. Fifty more seconds and this year, and everything it encompassed, would come to a close. Though not everything would stay in the past, I had a feeling I was already standing in my future.

Thirty seconds. Vessel gently pulled me to his chest, his smile endearing and his embrace warm. 

Twenty seconds. He leaned down, resting his forehead against mine. Currents of energy flowing between us at every connecting area. 

"Ten... Nine... Eight..." The other boys started counting down with the timer, each number getting louder and louder. For that I was thankful because my heart was nearly thrumming out of my chest. 

"Seven... Six... Five..." The New Years kiss is symbolic to most, it was considered a promise to spend the next year with that person. Was I really able to make such a promise?

"Four... Three...Two..." Vessels lips grazed against my own, and right then, I had my answer.

"One!" I closed the remaining centimeter between us and threw my arms over his shoulders. Cheers and party horns went off in the background, but were drowned out by my subconscious. I let go of everything surrounding us, both literally and metaphorically. The only thing that occupied my thoughts was him.

I may not be able to predict the future, but I knew one thing for certain: Come hell or high water, I would choose this man through either.