✧⁠*⁠。𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚔𝚢𝚞𝚞!! 𝙶𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚝 ✧⁠*⁠。

ɢᴏᴏꜱᴇᴏᴘʜᴏʙɪᴀ | ʙᴏᴋᴜᴛᴏ & ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ

this comment has been floating in the back of my head for a long time.

so, i made this headcanon real.

✿✿✿

Kuroo: hey bro

Bokuto: yeah, bro ?

Kuroo: wanna come over to my house ?

Bokuto: already there.

Kuroo: what

Bokuto: im already here.

Kuroo: oh so that's why i see someone pressed up against my window with a squashed face.

Bokuto: yeah :)

Kuroo: alright im going to unlock the door

Bokuto: wait
Bokuto: what's the point of texting then ?

Kuroo: oh.
Kuroo: uh

Bokuto: i still wanna text :(

Kuroo: ok so uh
Kuroo: go back home

Bokuto: im already there

Kuroo: ...
Kuroo: bro, do you have teleportation

Bokuto: yesnt

Kuroo: ..
Kuroo: ok then so what now

Bokuto: what were you gonna originally do

Kuroo: show you untitled goose game

Bokuto: untitled what ?

Kuroo: untitled goose game

Bokuto: are you sure you didn't just make that up ?

Kuroo: yeah

Bokuto: no way

Kuroo: yes way

Kuroo sent a photo

Bokuto: holy mother of honk

Kuroo: ikr

Bokuto: how do you play it ??

Kuroo: i'll set up a screen recording

Bokuto: ooo ok :)

...

Kuroo sent a video

Kuroo: there

Bokuto: GOOSE TIME

...

Bokuto: why is the screen thing trash can doopy

Kuroo: ... the quality ?

Bokuto: yeah why is the quality trash can doopy

Kuroo: uh i don't know, sorry-

Bokuto: nah you're good
Bokuto: i can just cross my eyes and squint.

Kuroo: don't do that, bro-

Bokuto: why not ?
Bokuto: why am i seeing pink fairies

Kuroo: what ??

Bokuto: pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows

Kuroo: bokuto are you ok

Bokuto: taste the rainbow

Kuroo: yeah i think you need your setter guy

Bokuto: aggashi ?

Kuroo: akaashi.

...

Kuroo: hey are you still here dude ?

Bokuto: the goo
Bokuto: goober
Bokuto: goose

Kuroo: goose ?

Bokuto: the goose :(

Kuroo: what happened ?

Bokuto: it chased a boy with a knife and robbed a bank :(

Kuroo: in the game ??

Bokuto: no

Kuroo: what.

Bokuto: KUROO. I THINK I HAVE GOOSEOPHOBIA

Kuroo: WHAT ??
Kuroo: HELP- WHERE DID THAT COME FROM ??

Bokuto: IM SCARED OF GOOSES

Kuroo: geese*, but continue.

Bokuto: THEY ROB STORES AND CHASE PEOPLE WITH KNIVES

Kuroo: no, no they dont, bokuto-

Bokuto: THEY DO
Bokuto: I HAD TO BREAKDANCE TO SAVE MY LIFE

Kuroo: W H A T
Kuroo: LMFAO- BOKUTO-

Bokuto: 🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦆🦢🦢🦢🦢

Kuroo: those are ducks and swans-

Bokuto: THEY DONT HAVE GOOSES, GEESE, CHEESE, WHATEVER THEY'RE CALLED

Kuroo: BOKUTO- I CANT BREATHE

Bokuto: 🐓
Bokuto: oh wait that's you nvm

Kuroo: WHAT DID I DO TO YOU 😭

✿✿✿

gooseophobia, a fear of geese.

it probably doesn't exist, and it probably never will.