ʜᴇʀ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ ᴀᴅᴍɪʀᴇʀ +15

Moments

I felt grey talking but couldn't hear anything, my mind was all set on where claire had her hands. I thought she said they were over, but Claire's still walks around like she owns her.

Grey was just walking with me at this point, I started to feel like an asshole. I was being so quiet, I shocked my head gently and looked up at Grey finally. Maybe this stop all this thinking. I nodded he was talking about Tyler, I haven't heard Tyler come out of Grey's mouth since he ghosted grey.

It puzzled me, I tilted my head and Grey  expression turned sad. I frowned and hugged him tightly, he rested his head ontop of mine and I wrapped my arms around his and he smiled.

"Fuck Tyler" I said as we were walking and I heard grey start to snicker, I looked up at him and he kept looking straight, "been there done that" he finally said and I let go of his arm pushing him.

"GREY. Gross I didn't mean it like that" I walked out of the entrance to my car, I opened the trunk and pit my bags in there grey was right next to me and he watched me, I know he was only doing this cause we saw Tommy. "You know I'm a big girl I can put these away alone" I added a snarky remark and he shook his head. I closed the trunk and he kissed the top of head in a loving way. I smiled and pushed him off of me, "just cause your taller then me now doesn't mean you get to treat me like your little sister"

"Yeah yeah whatever" he smiled and walked to his mini van getting into the driver's seat, I did the same and locked my car doors. It was getting late, the sun was starting to set and I was getting hungry. I don't think I ate very much today, I probably should though.

The sunset was very pretty, I think I could sit there for hours admiring it if I could. I finally turned on my car warming it up from the cold breeze, the wind was whistling against the hood of my car. I pulled out of my parking spot, I started to drive towards the highway. I wanted a chicken wrap, I will pretty much eat anywhere except McDonald's and KFC. But those are just to greasy.

Greasy food made my guts hurt, I pulled up to a Wendy's and just got fries. In all honesty I've been having the way I've been eating. I mean even for being pregnant claire is so petite. It made me feel gross.

I started to drive close to my home, I parked at a nearby school park and parked the car. I grabbed my fries and got out of the car locking it behind me. I made my way over to the swings, being by myself sometimes is so calming and relaxing. I loved being alone as much as I didn't, there's some goods and bads. Right now is one of those moments I need to be.

I started to eat my fries slowly one by one, I watched the sunset go down from  the swing set, God it's beautiful. It really reminds me of Luca, she's so beautiful. I loved the way she walked and talked and acts, she's so shy when she also isn't. I loved that girl so in all honesty it broke my heart letting her leave with claire today. I should've made her stay with me.

I let her leave and I didn't even try to stop her, and now she's probably hand in hand with claire. I pushed the swing back and forth with my feet that were shoved in the gravel. God I hate overthinking, but sometimes and only these rare sometimes it has its perks.

I yawned and continued to look at the sunset, I let my mind rest as my eyes gazed into the pinks and oranges in the sky. The hues were all different shades, i gripped my hands around the chains that held up the swing.

"My dear sweet Luca." I whispered swinging myself more then before, "please tell me my mind is playing tricks on me" I continued to talk to myself, I wanted her to tell me my mind was all wrong, I wanted her to hold me while I vented. I wanted her to kiss me and put my mind at ease.

Oh my dear Luca.