𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐞 ᵗᵐʳ ᵃᵘ

Chapter 10: The object in my pocket

WE made our way back to the hotel after the sun had set. I'm convinced my makeup was ruined because I was sweaty as shit.

"I'm taking the bathroom first," Minho said.

"Yeah, no." I walked into the bathroom and shut the door. I heard him sigh.

You don't deserve to live. You're the reason she's dead.

Woah, where the fuck did that come from? I haven't thought about death or the reason for her death for a long time. It's true though. It's my fault. Wait- no it isn't. Yes, it is. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes.

Yeah... It's my fault.

I try and push the thoughts away and turn on the shower. Yes, the weather was hot but that wasn't stopping me from showering in hot water. I accidentally lean on the shower door and it opens. I almost fall backwards but I grab onto the side of the shower. A flash of silver came into view for a second.

No.

It's almost been a full year. 

It's almost been a full two years since Gray. It's almost been a full two years since my mom's death. It's almost been a full year since I last used one. I'm almost there.

I wash my body, turn off the shower and use my makeup remover to remove the makeup. I dressed in my pyjamas again, but this time before I left, I slipped a familiar object into my pocket. I knock on the bedroom door. Minho opens the door.

"What?" He asked.

"I'm done showering," I said.

"I can see that, yes," He commented, looking at me up and down. His eyes froze on my pocket and his eyes narrowed.

"You can go shower now," I said before sitting on the couch. He slowly stalked to the bathroom and shut the door. I heard the lock click and the shower start. I stared at the object hidden in my pocket.

It's my fault they're worrying. It's my fault they almost panicked. It's my fault my mom died. It's my fault Minho hates me. It's my fault my ex was so abusive. It's my fault he failed that class. It's all my fault.

Minho

While in the shower I swear I could hear Anika crying. I've never seen her cry but I hear her crying in her room at night. I couldn't help but wonder what she was crying about. I never heard Anika talk about past relationships or her parents or her family for that matter. The only thing I've ever heard about her family was that her cousin lives in Paris, her mom's dead and her dad's gone. I never pushed her about it. She hates me. And I hate her back.

She got Hana arrested 2 times, got her detention multiple times and was suspended. Skipped class many times. She was the living version of the devil.

I still remember the day Hana first introduced me to her. Hana wanted to throw her a surprise party for Anika's 18th and she asked out parents for help, but not surprisingly, our parents had left Hana in my care again, because of their fucking business trips they always went on. I knew Hana didn't like that they were always gone she never stood up to them. Because they were gone and Hana was in my care, she asked for my help instead. Before the party, I had only heard of Anika and she didn't leave a good impression on me the first time she got Hana in trouble in 9th Grade.

Anika had recently moved to the U.S. and quickly became friends with Hana and her friends. I had a bad feeling from the start that she wasn't entirely as innocent as Hana had described. Turns out my gut feeling was fucking correct.

When Anika started getting Hana in trouble more, I had tried convincing her that Anika was a bad influence, because she was. Hana would only get mad at me though. I knew Hana and Anika were practically sisters by the time I tried convincing her so it was never easy getting her to listen to me warning her and Anika. Things got worse when she got Hana arrested when they both trespassed on private property. Anika had left before I saw her. She always did.

Whenever Anika got Hana in trouble, she would always flee before I arrived. I guess that's why I never got to see Anika because she always left before I was there and she never came to our house. Hana always went to hers.

When Anika's mom died, child care tried putting her in foster care but Anika said she had an uncle that would take care of her, only he showed up once to prove he would take care of her, then he fled. Many days I would only see Hana in the morning and then late at night, because she would always be over at Anika's. I had heard Anika sold her house when she turned 18, though I was never told why, nor was I interested in knowing.

I turn off the shower after washing myself and my hair. I opened the door but I heard shuffling and scrambling and when I left the bathroom, Anika looked as if she had just seen a fucking ghost. Pale, with wide eyes.

"You look like you just saw a fucking ghost," I commented, grabbing a glass from above the sink and pouring water in it.

"I just saw you," She snapped, her South African accent still clear as day under the American one she picked up.

"I know, I'm so handsome, right?"

"Not at all. You look like a zombie. Especially with that hair you always over-gel."

"You're just jealous that I have better hair than you," I said and she scoffed.

"Please, the only thing you're better at is being a bitch," Said I and snorted.

"Yeah, says you." I chugged the water before placing the cup in the sink and walking over to the bedroom door. "By the way, you're a bit rusty on your insults," I said before shutting the door. God, I just wanna- No, that's too brutal, even for the fucking devil living on the couch.

-

Around 4 hours later, I woke up to someone mumbling. It sounded like Anika. I wasn't worried that much until she screamed. I almost fell off of the bed, trying to get off. I rushed to the living room to see that she was still asleep.

What the hell? This is the second night.

"Anika!" I whisper-yelled. "Wake up." I lightly shook her shoulder. She darted up, her eyes quickly looking around the room and then at me. She looked terrified.

She didn't speak but I could see that her eyes were glassy. I pulled her in for a hug. It would be rude not to. She hugged me back tightly as if she was holding on for dear life.

"Hey? You okay?" I asked. She still didn't move. She was shivering slightly. "Anika, answer me, please." It came out as more of a plead than anything else.

"I- I'm okay," She said but her voice was shaky and teary.

"What's wrong?" I asked. She sniffed before letting go of the hug.

"Just a nightmare," She mumbled. I picked her up bridal style before putting her on the bed and throwing the blanket over her. "What are you doing? Where will you sleep?" She asked.

"I'll sleep on the couch. You need comfortable sleep right now," I said and when I started walking to the door, she grabbed my wrist.

"Can you stay?" She asked and I froze.

"You sure? I mean, I don't want to bother you."

"Please," She said and her voice was almost pleading, like she was scared of being alone. I nodded and got in the bed beside her.

"Sleep tight, Anika," I said before turning off the side table's lamp.