ELIZA

21

After their honeymoon in Montreal, Alina and Justine went back to Somerville and carried on with their lives. Work, sleep, eat. Fuck - sometimes. Adulthood made them tired.

The spring air rustled a change in Alina. She was now waking up at 4 a.m. She thought she would be like those productivity bros who had their whole day sorted by 9 a.m.

Wake up, work out, emails, eat, fuck. Wake up, work out, emails, eat. Wake up, work out. Wake up.

Then, Alina stopped sleeping altogether. No amount of working out or fucking could help her. Justine would try to hold her still in the night, but Alina could not knock out. She had stopped taking her meds after college. She started sleeping fine, and she thought the whole stress of being in a collegiate environment was the cause of her sleeplessness.

One night passed. Then, two. Then, five. Then, two weeks. Alina stopped being productive at work. She stopped working out. She just stopped.

That's when she started planning.

She knew where Justine's antidepressants were - and the big bottle of extra strength Tylenol. She just had to wait for Justine to leave. Justine was desperate for a solution and was so exhausted from lack of sleep herself. She knew better than to leave Alina alone, especially after Alina started cackling from sleeplessness on the seventh night.

They were quiet at the kitchen table, after seeing a doctor who wanted to prescribe Alina benzos to help with the sleep. Alina refused because they told her that they were addictive. Justine's eyes followed Alina as she made her way into the bathroom.

"Where are your pills?" Alina demanded.

Justine stayed quiet.

"And the knives? And the forks? What the FUCK did you do with everything?" Alina yelled out in rage.

Here came her moods, but nothing Justine ever experienced was like this. This was terrifying. Justine was triggered. She remembered the times that Alina would yell at her for looking at someone or the way she gaslit her every time Alina did something wrong.

"Fuck you." Alina jabbed.

"You don't mean that." Justine said, tears welling up.

"Fuck you." She said again.

"We're going to the hospital. You're being too much now, Alina." Justine said, crying.

"I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna -". Incomprehensibly speaking, she saw the pen on the counter.

Violently, she stabbed at her wrist, the red spurting all over the floor.

"No! Alina!" Justine cried, ripping her shirt as Alina ran away with the pen.

The cops burst through the door, macing Alina to disarm her. One cop pinned her down to the ground with one knee while the other handcuffed her to the hospital bed.

Alina had gotten a dose of something strong in the ambulance. As they drove away, Justine's weeping face blurred through the window.