Just a Taste // HS Blurbs

Forgotten II

Harry has never felt like a shittier boyfriend.

He left the pub in misty tears as he tugged at his hair, kicking the tire of his car as he cursed up a storm. This was a colossal fuck up on many instances. Not just because of their anniversary, but because Y/N had said many a time that being stood up was something that scared her. She had some anxiety socially and the idea of sitting there while everyone else knew what was happening around her and felt pity.

He had fucked up so badly and he could only pray and hope she wouldn't fucking break up with him.

Y/N was by far the best relationship he had ever had. In fact? Harry was sure she was the one. The one he would marry and settle down with. He had no plan b, no other option if she decided that this missight was something that she truly couldn't get over. Y/N was it for him. That's why this was so scary.

When he got home he cried. Feeling the guilt and fear eating away at his stomach, angry at himself but knowing there was no one to blame. It was his fault he hadn't set alarms and hadn't paid attention today. It was even worse considering he was going to do things for the day he had thought was their anniversary. He had the floral delivery scheduled and an outfit picked out and a gift for her tucked in an envelope. A nice big one that she had always wanted to experience- fuck.

He didn't sleep at all, really. Taking a long shower and tucking himself into bed didn't do much considering how lonely the bed truly felt now. It felt so... cold. Empty. And it made him think about how she must have felt in the booth, all alone. Looking at Insta gram stories to see him out with their mates without her. Without even checking in. He had stupidly assumed she would just be there considering they usually hung out with them on Friday nights.

Y/N didn't fare much better in her own bed, cry swollen eyes and a mound of tissues in her trash bin. Snuggled up in her bed in one of his sweatshirts. Even being as upset as she was with him, she craved the comfort only Harry had ever been able to give. His scent and the warmth, his fingertips brushing the sensitivity of her spine and the gentle hum he would do to relax her when she got especially anxious or upset. He knew how to work her to be at ease.

It was good to be apart from him though, now that she was thinking about it. There were things he was doing that she had overlooked for a while but joe could face head on. One was not answering his phone when he was out. He was decent about it at work but sometimes he was impossible to reach and it was a source of her anxiety. Her intrusive thoughts opening up into thinking he was hurt or angry with her. And then it was lately, feeling as if their friends had more priority in his life than her. It was only just starting but something she noticed. Inviting people on their one on one plans or making them plans with people when Y/N really just wanted to be alone with him.

It hurt. A lot of things did, but she also knew Harry wasn't a mean person. He would be gutted to know how upset he had been making her lately. He was in general, a great boyfriend. The best she had. But right now it was easier to see the negatives and it was like a punch to the gut.

By the time morning came, Harry was pacing about his kitchen. No sleep colored his face and it was obvious he had both cried and not gotten a wink. He waited for the text back saying she was awake so he could go see her. It was already 10 am and he had been dressed and up since 6, hoping and praying this wasn't the end of their relationship.

As soon as the text came that he could come, he bolted. Running out with his card in hand and keys in the other, probably breaking traffic laws to get to her. It was a need. Wanting to hold her physically and make sure he hadn't lost her.

Though the moment the door opened his heart sank, seeing her swollen eyes and lips from crying and her arms wrapped around herself. She looked small. Sad. Unsure. And he wanted to kick himself for ever making such a sweet thing feel those things. He knew he didn't look much better considering she looked a bit concerned as she saw his unkempt hair and face, but she stepped back to let him in.

"I'm sorry." His voice was hoarse as he spoke. "Baby... I'm so fucking sorry. I didn't mean to do it and that doesn't make it any better but... I know your fear and I never wanted to make you feel that and I did." He swallowed thickly, stepping closer. "I had... stuff planned out. For Sunday, which is when I thought it was. A whole day before our reservations and- I have our gift." He handed it to her. "It's... a trip for us. To the Italian coast. Hotel hopping. I paid for it all and it's going to happen in about a month from now. I swear.." he watched her as he got closer and saw no sign to back up, his hand holding her shoulders. "I'd never do this to you on purpose. I love you far too much. I never want to lose you." He expressed as his hands moved down her arms to grab hers.

"I know." Her croaky voice sounded out. "I know you didn't do it on purpose, Harry. It was an intrusive thought. I know you wouldn't do that to me to be mean. I just got s-scared." She hiccuped, tears welling in her eyes that absolutely broke him.

"Oh no... no, baby." He pulled her into his body, wrapping his arms around her as her face buried in his chest. It felt like someone had knocked him in the chest. "Never want you to cry. I hate that I've made you upset at all. Hate making you cry, ever." He kissed against her hair, trying to soothe her, hands rubbing her back.

"I k-know. You're so lovely the rest of the time but I... that hurt so badly." He cursed internally as she sniffled against his chest. Hearing the hurt he caused, even by accident, it stung. It made him feel dumb.

"I know, my love. I know. But I can't begin to make up for it at all. I'm so... I've been up all night worried about you. That you'd want to leave me... and I couldn't blame you for being that angry with me. But I love you so much. I don't want you to leave. I want to make it up to you." He felt his own eyes getting wet again, the burn making him close them as he inhaled her scent. Scared it would be the last time.

"No. No. I wouldn't... I wouldn't break up with you for that, Harry. You didn't do it on purpose." She croaked against him. "I love you, Harry. This won't ruin this but... I feel betrayed and... hurt. And i think we have to have a talk but i want you. I love you. Forever." She kissed the place on his chest where his heart was thundering against her cheek. "We can fix this. Won't be easy but... I need you."