𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐲

chapter 32

You're walking back to the bus stop to try and get home as quickly as you can, when you suddenly feel a hand grab your arm and tug you back. You turn around with a gasp, only to be faced with Seojun again.
"What's going on with you?" he asks sternly, but before you can even try to respond he continues speaking. "And don't even try lying and saying that it's nothing. Every time I'm around you find some excuse to leave. It's like you can't even stand being in the same room as me anymore. Did something happen?" he continues. "Did I do something?" His voice is quieter now, eyes desperate.

"Seojun, it's nothing," you respond as you try to remove your hand from his grip, but instead he just holds onto your upper arms tightly so you're facing him completely.
"It's not nothing," he says, pulling you closer and staring into your eyes as if looking for answers. The sudden tug causes you to almost lose your balance, and you instinctively hold onto his forearms to keep yourself up. You gulp at the proximity, glancing at his eyes for a moment before looking behind him instead. "You're avoiding me, how can you say that?"

You don't understand why he's so adamant on figuring out what the problem is.
"Seojun..." you whisper, staring into his eyes.
"Please tell me what's going on," he says softly, his eyes pleading. You want to tell him. You want to tell him how you feel about him so so badly, but you can't. Not when you know how he feels about your best friend. It would be too selfish of you.
"Please let me go," you say, trying to get out of his hold once again.

"I just need to know why my best friend is avoiding me." The words best friend send a pang to both of your hearts, except Seojun doesn't understand why. You stop fighting his grip. Frustration bubbles up inside you, finally causing you to snap.
"Just leave me alone Seojun!" you shout, causing him to freeze. Regret instantly hits you at the sight of his crestfallen expression. You let out a shaky breath, closing your eyes for a moment.

"Look, I'm sure you will find out eventually. But for now, please leave me alone. I just need some time," you tell him softly. "Yes, I had a panic attack that day, but I'm not ready to talk about it yet. I thought I could deal with it alone, that's why I didn't call you. And besides, you were busy at the time." Seojun looks at you in confusion at the last part, what do you mean he was busy? But before he can ask, you continue speaking. "Just please, give me some time," you beg, and he stares at you in shock, because this is the most you've said to him in days.

You grab his arms softly and move them so they're at his sides and no longer holding onto you, and he looks down at your hands. When he sees that the bracelet he gifted you is still not visible, he feels his heart break a little more, the token of your friendship still not present. He lets you push him away gently, feeling too defeated and shocked at your words to have the strength to fight back.
"I'll see you later, okay?" you tell him, before finally turning around and continuing your journey to the bus stop. He doesn't say anything as he watches you walk away, not being able to do anything about it.

At school the following day, you can tell Jugyeong has a lot on her mind. With balancing her part time job and trying to figure out what to do with her college applications, you can tell everything is starting to take a bit of a toll on her. You also feel like you could use some time with your friend, because of everything happening with you recently. You decide to do something to cheer her up and hopefully get her mind off everything for a while.

After school you go straight home to catch up on some homework and cook something for your mother to eat before leaving, telling her that you will be out for a few hours, before heading over to Jugyeong's house.

Her mother answers the door and is pleasantly surprised to see you standing there. You greet her politely and she grins.
"Y/N, It's so nice to see you!" She ushers you in, and when you enter you see Jugyeong's father and brother sitting in the living room. You bow in greeting to her father, and ruffle her Juyeong's with a smile. The two wave at you happily. "What brings you here?" she asks.

"I was hoping to help you with dinner today, Jugyeong's been feeling a bit down lately because of exams and she's studying so hard, so I thought it would help cheer her up," you explain. You knew Jugyeong's part time job was a secret so you leave out that part, just that you can tell she's been having a hard time and you thought doing something to make her feel better would be a sweet gesture. You had been helping her study a lot more often and she's been doing really well, and you were really proud of all the hard work she's been putting in recently.

Jugyeong's mother pulls you into a hug, smiling at the fact that you're such a wonderful friend to her daughter.
"That's so sweet of you, of course we can make something!" She explains that she was just about to start cooking dinner but wasn't sure of what to make. You ponder for a moment before looking at her with a grin.
"How about dumplings?" you ask her, and she smirks at the idea.
"Perfect!" she claps her hands together, and you all get straight to work.

You enjoy this time you spend with Jugyeong's family, just talking and joking around with them while you cook. It helps get your mind off everything, and they all really enjoy your company too so they're incredibly kind and welcoming. It's also nice to be able to spend this time with them, having not seen them in a while, with everything going on and also tests coming up soon. They really enjoy your company too. Even Juyeong loves spending time with you whenever you come over - he really admires you and thinks you're incredibly kind. The boy has even developed the nickname 'pretty noona' for you which warms your heart. You're also the only person who happens to know about his crush so he often comes to you for advice, which you find incredibly entertaining.

After a while Jugyeong's mother realises she wants to make a larger amount of dumplings so that she can store some of them for later, but you don't have enough ingredients. You decide to make a batch for now with what you have, both the ingredients Jugyeong's mother has in her house and the ones you brought, while she goes out to buy some more. You offer to go instead, but she insists that she'll be okay, telling you that she also wanted to double check if she locked up the salon today.

"Oh, Suho's here!" you hear her say excitedly, said boy standing at the door about to knock when she opens it to leave. You look over in confusion at the sentence, only to see him standing in the doorway looking back at you. You let out a little smile before going back to cooking, but you both know the smile is forced. You hear Jugyeong's mother inviting him in, and she instructs him to help you set the table and begin assembling the dumplings while she's gone.

You finish making the filling not too long after, and you all clear the table in the living room and set it up to begin making the dumplings. Suho sits down beside you quietly, the two of you having not exchanged any words since he arrived. You guessed he must've had the same idea, wanting to do something to help cheer up Jugyeong since you all know she's been quite down lately, and the thought that he would do that for her makes you happy. He really does treat her well.

At the same time, Jugyeong and Seojun are on their way home from work, both having had a closing shift together. They sit in silence for a while on the bus journey back, before Seojun speaks up.
"Do you know what's going on with Y/N?" he asks, turning slightly to face Jugyeong. She looks over at him and sees the conflicted expression on his face, feeling bad for him that he's clearly feeling so upset by the way you're acting.

She thinks for a moment, before shaking her head solemnly. She can guess it has something to do with the way you feel about Seojun, but she can't say for sure. It's also not really her place to say.
"Sorry, I don't," is all she can say. He sighs in response.
"I don't know how to fix this." She can tell how upset he is by the tone of his voice as he speaks. "I've been trying to speak to her and ask her what's wrong so that I can fix it, but she just keeps shutting me out and avoiding me. She's never been like this with me before, I don't know what to do." Jugyeong's heart breaks a little, she can see how much he cares about you - he's clearly worried.