Friendship? [H.S.]

Chapter 59

*Song for this chapter: Let it Go by James Bay*

(sexy time)

"Ok, so... you said there's things you wanted to talk about?" Jake had sat back in his chair; he looked much more relaxed now and I hoped it stayed like that.

I hadn't even thought about how to approach the subject with him. I know I'm not crazy in thinking his attitude and personality around us had changed because Harry picked up on it, Gemma even noticed it before we left London to come back on tour, and the glances from crew and tour staff were getting harder to ignore. Gentry said he'd been posting pictures of us on his stories, and I even made it to the grid. I guess I should like it, but I honestly don't interact much on there anymore. It's just not fun anymore.

How do I tell him he's making me feel like I'm a piece of land that he's staking claim to and posting Private Property signs all over the place to let people know I'm his...

"Yeah... so... ok...." I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly with my eyes closed. This will help, just don't look at him. "I've noticed since we took that next step in the relationship..." My hands were starting to sweat, and I could feel my face flushing. "Since we, you know..." I lifted a shoulder twice, "eh eh... yeah... Um since then, you've become a little territorial with me and I just wanted to make sure everything was ok."

I opened one eye to look at him and he was just grinning widely. "Did you just struggle to say since we had sex?" I sighed heavily and felt like I was a balloon deflating. My shoulders slumped and my head hung a bit. "No, baby. I'm not laughing at you. I'm not making fun of you. It was seriously one of the cutest things I've seen you do."

I looked up at the ceiling and took another deep breath. "I just don't like talking about this kind of thing outside of like, establishing boundaries or it actually happening... it's weird. I know. I'm sorry."

"No. Jana, look at me." I lowered my head until I was looking at him. "You don't need to apologize. You never need to apologize to me for expressing things that make you uncomfortable. Ok?" I nodded. "Can you explain to me how I've become territorial?"

I just want to jump out the window. I don't know why I even initiated this conversation. It's very unnecessary...

I'm an adult.

I am working on my mental health and my therapist believes in me... I can do this.

"So, one of the things that I noticed change is the amount of PDA... like when we are in a room with other people, you never really let me sit next to you, you always pull me to sit in your lap. You've been extra kissy and not just pecks here and there... just.. things like that. I don't really like PDA much more than a hug or holding hands." I'm going to be sick. That's mean of me to tell him that he's being too affectionate.

He nodded at me. "Is it because of Harry?"

I felt my eyebrows trying to hold hands as they creased, and my mouth opened a bit before I was able to form words. "Are you asking if I don't like PDA because of Harry or if I'm talking about this because of Harry?"

"Did Harry say something? I feel like since we've gotten back, he's been really needy with you."

"Harry hasn't said anything. He asked me if I was ok when you left the room in Hamburg because he could tell I was uncomfortable with the way you kissed me and were basically sucking my neck while he talked to Gentry on the phone." I stared at him for a beat. "Are you not ok with mine and Harry's friendship?"

"It's not that I'm not ok with it babe. It's just hard to see another guy know how to handle you better than I do. You're my girlfriend."

"Handle me?"