Reaper ~ THG AU

Ch. 45: Fine

⚠️Trigger warning to anyone who struggles with PTSD. Please read at your own risk ⚠️

I lay where I have for the last week. The only time I get up is when I need to absolutely use the bathroom, or when Briar forces me to shower. Other than that, I lay where I am now. The room is twice the size of Aurelia and I's from before, all of my and Acacius's crates piled in the far corner where my dresser should be. A fireplace is near a large window, both covered up and dark like the rest of the room.

Atlas hasn't talked to me since the night of Acacius's memorial six days ago, his time spent working with the people of the district. Briar spends a lot of time here maintaining the new house and working to make it a home. I want to get up and help her, but I can't seem to force myself out of this bed.

Sloan and Aurelia have classes once more and Sven works most days, leaving this house as cold and empty as I feel at the moment. I have no clue why I feel this way, just that every time I try to get up I'm paralyzed with memories of what I've done and who I've lost.

The same dirty work shirt of my brother's is clutched in my hand every night. The smell of him is still strong, making me comfortable enough not to cry every moment he's not here. Aurelia tried to sleep in here with me the first few nights, but after what happened the first night...

——

*Six nights ago*

I lay in my new bed, trying desperately to sleep. The same memories play every time I close my eyes, preventing me from getting even a wink. Based on the clock above my unlit fireplace, I've been laying here for two hours already.

"Azalea?"

My head snaps up at the sound of my door opening. My younger sister steps in, her stuffed rabbit clutched tightly in her hands. She slowly walks forward as I sit up.

"Yeah?"

"Can I sleep in here tonight? I'm not used to my own bedroom..."

"Of course, Buttercup...you don't have to ask..."

She comes over, climbing into my bed beside me. She immediately cuddles up to me, her head resting on my chest. I wrap my arm around her as I pull the blanket to cover us both up. Soon, she's snoring away and I feel my own drowsiness overtaking me.

*Dream*

I'm right back in the same clearing, the only difference being there being no flowers or fire burning. It's still dark, yet I can see despite there being no light source visible. My hands are empty, no knife or weapon of any kind on me. There seems to be no bags draped over my shoulders and back.

Suddenly I'm tackled to the ground, Augustus hovering over me with the same red gleam covering his face. His eyes are wild as he stares down at me, a wide smile over his lips. His hands clutch my throat as I struggle to breathe. My own hands wrap around his wrists trying to get him off of me.

"Stupid Bitch! I win! You lose! I'm never leaving! You'll have to see me till the day you join me! You hear that! You dumb fucking bitch!"

I tap around, finding a rock near me. I grip it, immediately reaching up and hitting him in the head. He falls to the side, staring up at me as I climb on top of him.

"I said get off me! I said get off of me! I said get off of me!"

My hands wrap around his throat, gripping tight as my screams fill the clearing. My throat feels raw as I continue to scream the same thing over and over..and over again.

"I said get off of me!"

"Azalea!?!"

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