You knew me already?//Billie Eilish

distanced

Hi guys, this is the last chapter :) I already wrote a sequel to this book though.

August 30th:

-Lisa's pov-

We slept in late because we stayed up talking until 2:30 a.m. I woke up before Billie and found her clinging to me. I stayed still and looked at her face, so close to mine I could feel her breath.

Tears filled my eyes as I thought about the fact that we had to leave each other and go back home today. I let the tears flow silently, not wanting to wake her. After some time, I wiped my face dry on the pillow and held her tightly.

She woke up after a while and was startled when she saw me so close. "You scared me, love," she said.

I kissed her softly a few times and ran my fingers through her hair. She noticed the stain on my pillow and teased me about drooling in my sleep. I forced a smile, but she could tell it wasn't genuine.

"You cried, didn't you? Your eyes are all red, and your face is pale," she said, gently caressing my cheeks.

I nodded, and she reassured me. "I know this sucks, and I'm not happy about it either. But we'll be alright. Please don't always cry; it makes me feel guilty about leaving. I promise I'll find a way to see you again soon."

After a while, we got out of bed because my train was leaving at 2 p.m. I showered, washed my hair, and packed my things into my bag.

"Do you want to order room service? You need to eat something before your 14-hour train ride, love," Billie suggested.

"I don't have an appetite. I really can't eat right now," I replied, feeling nauseous.

We went to Zoe's and Dante's room to say goodbye, and it felt sincere, so maybe Zoe had really calmed down. Then I bid farewell to Finn and Claudia. "I'm going to miss you so much, Claudia. Thank you for keeping me such good company."

"It was my pleasure, Lisa. Don't hesitate to contact me anytime. Have a safe journey. I love that you're taking the train instead of flying. It shows real commitment to saving the environment," Claudia said.

Billie and I went down to the lobby, where Bobby, the driver, was waiting with a smile.

"Miss Winter, I hope you enjoyed your stay with us. May I take your bag?" he kindly asked.

We got into the van and headed to the train station. I told myself not to make a big deal out of it. We held hands throughout the ride.

"Well, thank you for taking me on this trip. Promise to let me know when you're back in Europe," I said.

"I will, I promise," she replied, kissing me goodbye. Suddenly, everything felt distant. Maybe I was overthinking, but she was a little different. Something was off.

"Bye Bobby, I love you," I said.

"Goodbye, love," she responded.

Why didn't she say it back? We've said it before?

I felt sickening in my stomach. I quickly grabbed my weekend bag and got out of the van. I felt insecure about the situation and didn't understand whether something was wrong,  but I didn't want to ask. I felt like it wasn't my place, either.

I made my way to the platform and waited for the train to arrive. As I boarded it, I felt like throwing up. Luckily, I had a bed compartment again, which made the journey more comfortable.

I worked on my laptop for eight hours straight, trying to distract myself from overthinking.  I arrived back home in my city at 5 a.m.

I felt terrible, lacking sleep, emotionally drained, and physically unwell. I arrived at my apartment an hour later, showered, and went to bed. I slept for another three hours and then worked for four. After that, I texted Billie and asked if she had arrived in LA, but she didn't respond.

Yet, despite my attempts to distract myself, I couldn't resist reaching out to Billie. I just needed to hear from her that everything was alright, yearning for some connection and reassurance. But her lack of response only made it worse, leaving me feeling more lost and uncertain than ever.

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