Inner Demons

Music Is In My Soul

Have you ever just wondered about yourself? About how your just so different from your friends. You share many similarities with them, yet you're so different. You guys may like the same song or whatever, but deep down you know that your favorite music taste is extremely different. Like you like the song, but it doesn't fully describe you. The song doesn't fully tell your story. It's not fully you. But, you sit there with your friends and jam out to the song. You want to show them so badly your own unique music taste since they have shown you theirs. You try to show them your music, your inner most feelings, your soul, but they don't like your song or music taste not even one minute into the song. You just dismiss it. You tell yourself that it's to personal to share at that point in the friendship. But it's been forever since you've known each other. You didn't just try your music out with one friend.....You tried testing it out with some of your other friends. The. Same. Response.
Current scenario- They could play their hearts' desire for certain music and you would just be happy and jam out to their personal mix of music. Future scenario- Later on in life you get together with your most closest friends ever. You're having a party. It's your own party. Since it's your own party you finally get to pick out the music. It's your style of music. But, there's one problem......no one likes your music. So you slip in as many popular songs and songs that you and your friends like, but you also put in a few songs you personally love. At the end of the party, they leave and you start jamming out to your music. The music that describes your inner most thoughts, the music that describes your inner being, the music that tells your life's story, and the music that describes what you want to aspire to be. The music that is you and yourself. The music that can speak when you're speechless. Your friends come back. You don't notice them so you just keep jamming out to one of your favorite songs. Meanwhile they are just staring at you. Just staring. And staring. Why are you jamming out to this type of music they ask. I like this music you reply. You say this because it IS the truth. Why haven't you told us you like this music they ask. You never asked you say. They NEVER asked about my music taste. They ASSUMED that it was the same as everyone else's taste. I'm not the rest of society you say. I'm different. And I'm proud. Without our differences everything would be boring. Now they are looking at you like you've lost it. But it's true. You can't expect everyone to like the same thing all the time. You could, however, blend in to the background to make it seem as if you do like the same thing. That's what you've done. You've created the illusion of being part of the society, when in reality you mostly disagreed with it. The popular music acted as the cloak. It hid my inner vibes/soul/music taste from the rest of the world. Popular music somehow manages to shield our inner music. The music we long for someone to tell us that it is nice not horrid. Someone to tell us that no matter what we listen to, we shouldn't judge people based on our music taste. We are all people with feelings and emotions. We can break too. Music just expresses us in ways we can't. It expresses our souls.