Joabana and the Specter of Doofatanian Intervention

The static from the television buzzed after a hand pressed a button. It turned the channel to DCT, otherwise known as Danville Community Television. A voice began speaking.

"Hello everyone! Welcome to Lopez on Point! I'm your host, Amanda Lopez. Today, we have two guests who represent different perspectives on the current situation in Joabana."

Clearing her throat, she continued. "We are doing this at the request of our loyal viewers, people like you," she said, smiling. The socially distanced crowd, all of whom had been vaccinated (and tested), and wore masks cheered. "AMANDA! AMANDA! AMANDA!" they shouted enthusiastically, making her embarrassed.

"Thank you all. Today we are here to talk about a critical issue." She pointed to her two guests.

"We have with Adora Eros, director of the Progressive Joabana Liberation Institute, and a frequent guest, and chair of the Joabana Solidarity Coalition, Elena Castillo Flores!"

The crowd cheered once more. Lopez began to speak. "Ms. Eros, I'll let you go first." Adora breathed deeply and began. She hoped to bring more people to her side and strengthen the "liberation movement" as she termed it.

"Well, Ms. Lopez, thanks for inviting me to the show. Joabana has nothing more than a horrid tyranny. Black Joabanans have no ability to express themselves. The foreign policy of Doofatania has damaged the country, but so has the government's repression!"

Elena shook her head. She couldn't get how someone who seemed so knowledgeable could be so ill-informed. She tried to be as gracious as she could before she began her ruthless criticism.

"While I appreciate Ms. Eros for noting how Doofatania has harmed the people of Joabana, is more extensive than she is acknowledging."

She explained why this is the case. "The country is really hurting now because of the pandemic, which created economic contractions, plus the blockade declared by President Doofenshmirtz to bring the country to its knees. want it removed!"

Adora growled. She knew that Elena had a point. Even so, she also wanted to win this argument. She snickered.

"So, you admit they are in dire straits, then. Ha! We must listen to Black Joabanans in the front of these protests and hear their cries for help. We cannot let tyranny reign...the island is not a playground for political ideologues...and it is no paradise!"

She then shouted, "Free Joabana!" while sipping from her rum and coke, which she smuggled onto the stage. Amanda would have jumped in. She decided it would be better to just let them debate, while she watched like a spectator.

Sighing, Elena knew what she must do. She predicted that Adora's arguments on Joabana, with the main thrust that people should listen to Joabanans because they are "suffering." She knew what she had to do. She started picking away at Adora's argument.

"I am glad we both agree that the country is in a perilous place, but we have...different approaches. If you believe that Doofatania's foreign policy is such a disaster, then why are you passively promoting it? I don't get it."

To make her point even further, she added, "you know, Miss, Black Joabanans were at the head of protests on the island which favored its radical government...you little worm." This pushed Adora over the edge. How could someone call her a worm?

She wanted to angrily shout back, but Amanda interrupted. She told them why. "Commercial break." Adora felt relieved.

The ad began: "Ever wanted to chew gum and have bouncy shoes? Today you can have both, with the new gumshoes! They are made completely of material which you can chew in your mouth...and you can move across the ground like an astronaut."