smoking kills - klaus hargreeves | the umbrella academy

chapter one

"hello! who are you?" a young boy's voice shouted from above the girl in the alley. his voice slightly echoed, cutting through the quiet midnight air. well, as quiet as new york can get. she looked up at the pale boy with dark, curly hair standing on the second floor fire escape. his light colored pajamas had smudges of dirt on them from where he rested his arms on the railing. in his hands he held a lit cigarette. she clicked her teeth at the sight. he raised his eyebrows at her in an amused fashion. "can a kid not smoke away his life's troubles in peace?"

she raised an eyebrow. "you're the one who started talking to me first."

"aw, fine, you got me. i'm just always looking for someone to talk to," he said with a sly smile.

"aren't you too young to be smoking? where are your parents?" she asked. he seemed young, around her age: 12.

he laughed. "aren't you too young to be out at midnight by yourself? where are your parents?"

"my dad's a dick. i just needed to get out for awhile."

"ah, same. that's why i smoke. you want one? i have a brand new box." he grabbed the freshly opened box of cigarettes from beside him, shaking it to entice her. it rattled sadly, just a symbol of neglect.

"nah, dude, i'm not putting that shit in my body." she scrunched up her nose at him. "you're gonna die of lung cancer, you know."

"i hope it happens soon," he said, grinning, not missing a beat.

"you're strange." she shook her head at him and laughed.

"why, thank you." he took a step back from the railing to bow with a fancy flourish of his hand.

"you're welcome? i'm gonna leave now. see you around, i guess." she waved goodbye to the boy, and walked back the way she came.

"see ya!" he yelled after her.

it was just a week later when she saw him again. she had passed through the alley on her way out, and she didn't see him, although she looked. it was on her way back through the alley when she saw him for the second time.

"yoo-hoo!" a voice shouted. she looked up to see the kid wildly waving his hands, standing on the same fire escape from before. he was wearing the same messy pajamas as when she saw him the first time. when she looked up, he smiled wide. "it's you again! hello!"

"oh, hi," she said. she nodded to the cigarette in his hand. "i thought i told you smoking kills."

"yeah, and it's taking forever." the kid scoffed. "death takes and takes all around me yet it doesn't seem to want to take me as well."

"what do you mean?" she leaned against the wall opposite to him, staring up at him, her arms crossed.

"oh, you know, just that feeling of being watched." his eyes trailed away from hers and into the sky. "someone's eyes are on you, but you can't tell from where. you swear you see someone walk past, but when you go to look, no one is there. hearing strange noises come from the walls, it's all..." he waved his hand around, cigarette lightly held between his fingers. his gaze found its way back to the girl, then he sighed. he mumbled, shaking his head, "nevermind."

the girl frowned, not sure of what to think of his statements. "can i tell you something?" she asked after a moment.

"please." he gestured with his hand for her to continue.

a breeze sent a chill down her spine. she shivered, shoving her hands back into her jacket's pockets. "i came back here hoping to see you again."

he dramatically put a hand to his heart and a hand to his forehead. "oh, you did? how sweet and romantic! i'm flattered, truly."

"don't get ahead of yourself, pal. it's more of humans' innate morbid curiosity of not being able to look away from a train wreck." she scrunched up her nose. "i don't fall in love that easily, anyway, especially not for boys i just met who smoke to cope with their daddy issues."

he laughed loudly, making her jump. "if only that was the reason! you know, i wasn't joking when i said death is all around me."

"this is why i came back to find you. you say the strangest things. what does that even mean!" she paused. "are you clinically insane?"

he laughed again. "probably! i don't know. i feel it, though." he took a drag of his cigarette. "if you think i'm strange, though, you should see— hey! you know what, i have something i need to show you! come back here in two days, same time... actually i don't know what time it is right now. just come by around midnight. okay?"

"are you going to kill me?" she replied.

"if i wanted to kill you, babe, you'd be dead," the boy deadpanned.

"don't call me that. what do you even have to show me?"

"oh, it's a surprise! you'll see, though. there's no danger involved, trust me!" the boy added after a moment, "i don't mean anything by it, by the way. just something i say. or is it? you decide."

"you're difficult to deal with."

"you know you love me," he quipped, quicker than she could say anything else.

"i just met you!"

"love at first sight is a real thing, you know. didn't you feel the spark?"

"i'm leaving," she rolled her eyes, and turned on her heel.

as she walked away, the boy called after her, "wait! wait! you're coming in two days, right?"

when she didn't respond, he yelled louder, "i'm sorry my charisma was too much for you!"

she laughed, but kept walking, eventually turning the corner and getting out of sight. he shouted one more thing: "see you thursday!"