The Fear Between Us

Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Let's talk.

It has been a couple of days since the last time we spoke. I have been avoiding her ever since trying my best to keep a level head. This isn't to say that she hasn't tried to gain my attention again, I just don't allow us to be alone for long enough. The memories have been coming back more ever since I remembered Josephine Maxwell. That's another thing, I remember us in Russia on the day we fled and before then. Life was simpler back then, but I wish that we all died, I wish we never made it out of Moscow, and that we never even landed in America. Sometimes I can hear the waves crashing, my quiet heartbeat thumping, the still air roaring and my soft feet running. I wish Rosewood never insisted on any of this in the first place.

"Please have a seat soldier."

"I would prefer to stand if you wouldn't mind sir," I say with my hands stiff behind my back feeling out of depth—the general eyes at me for a moment before finally saying, "Very well then. I just called for you to follow up on Captain Rosewood's interrogation. She hasn't tried doing any of that again, has she?" He asks me to get straight to the point. I don't answer him immediately though, instead, my mind drifts off again, why was he so adamant in saying that I came on a ship if it didn't even matter?

"No sir, she hasn't."

"Excellent, I want you to report to me right away when she does try again." He commands as I nod in response to acknowledge that I heard what he said. He leans back into his chair getting back to his daily routine. Taking a step back my eyes drift downwards to pull away, however, in the corner of my eye, I catch a glimpse of the M1911, the colour, the handle, the nuzzle and the trigger. Everything was the same, "Get on your knees!" The cold exterior of the metal was already pressing against Josephine's cheek by the time the general snapped me out of it, "Soldier, you good?"

"Mm? No, I'm okay, just a little lightheaded," I respond clearing my throat, "would you—would you mind if I saw that?" I ask taking a chance. A voice in the back of my head kept saying no but another kept saying that I needed to see. The general points at the gun confused yet proud as he hands it over, "It's an M1911, a gift from the president. It's old and outdated but it still shoots, so it still does the job!" He snickers with an odd laugh as I weigh it in my hands, for a moment I press my palm at the tip of the nuzzle trying to feel a pattern, it's hard to tell but I know that it's the gun. Memory from trauma is the only thing that makes sense of things that were never there in the first place, it's almost too good to be true, "She's a beauty." I say handing it back to him as he leans over to take it, "Yeah, she is. The president was a fool if you ask me, he doesn't know what he got rid of." The general says with a satisfied sigh. Oh yes, he does.

The day was just as long as the dawn on the horizon, it was almost as if someone had frozen this moment just so that they could savour it for one last time. I decided to take an early night's rest, the days would become longer with summer drawing closer. I just need to clear my mind. Approaching my room, I see a silhouette shining through from the soft light entering from outside, "What do you want?" I ask without greeting the familiar structure. I should watch my tone, she is still the captain after all, "C'mon, let's just talk please."

"No, I told you I couldn't do this anymore, you have to let it go," I say to her now standing over her and looking down slightly. Despite her looking nothing like Josephine, nor having her personality, something about this Josephine drew me in. She was pulling me in ways that I never expected she would. Rosewood sighs out of frustration. She's stubborn, but so am I. We were playing a losing battle trying to decide what was right or wrong, "Can I at least come in?" she asked, making it my turn to sigh now. I step away slightly giving me enough space to unlock the door and push it open with one hand giving her the non-verbal signal to enter.

I close the door behind her as she turns around in the middle of the room waiting for me to give my attention to her, "I heard the general wanted to see you today."

"He just asked about you," I say with a pause debating if I should tell her the rest. I place the keys down on the desk before taking off my jacket to reveal the white tank top underneath, she stays quiet, waiting for me to say something else just like a predator waits for its prey in the bushes, "I saw the gun too." I eventually add now gaining her attention even more, "He let you see it? How?" She questions with a hint of disbelief and disappointment, "The 'how' is not important, the point is that I got to see the gun and it's that one." I say a little agitated, "Okay, so it's an M1911."

"No. It's that gun, Josephine."

"Since when are we on a first-name basis?"

"Do you want my help or not?" I snap at her snicker. I don't know what it is about her, but she makes me feel hot, irritated, annoyed and bothered. Josephine smiles at my miniature outburst which makes me feel that hot flush again, clearing my throat as I look away from her for a moment before I finally speak again, "If we're going to continue, I need you to be honest with me," Josephine doesn't say anything, she just stares at me with her big eyes now sparkling in the dull yellow light of my room, she looks just as flushed as me with her hair now hanging loose on her shoulders and her jacket thrown on the floor, "I need you to tell me why this is so important to you." Silence fills the room again; she looks away avoiding eye contact before standing and making her way towards me. She's older yet shorter than me just by a head, she's toned in her physique and her hips curve slightly out just enough to make a nock for a hand to be placed comfortably by her waist, "I can't..." She says making me scoff yet smile out of annoyance. She is something else, "It's not that that I won't, it's that I can't. Trust me, the less you know the better. But I can tell you this, it does involve your father, Alexei Aleekseeva."