For Our Eyes Only

1- Reminders

"Bye bud" Louis said, waving and kissing Freddie's forehead one last time before leaving.

The cool February breeze caused Louis to shiver a little. He zipped his jacket up quickly and got into the car, turning up the heat as soon as it would start. As he drove home, Louis found himself thinking of the One Direction days, and all the times they had interacted with younger fans. The happiness he had felt around kids was not nearly as much as the excitement and joy he felt meeting his newborn for the first time since he had come home from the hospital.

Louis stopped at a stoplight and tapped on the wheel while humming for a moment until it turned for him to go. Before he knew it, he had made it home to his apartment. He turned off the car and leaned his head back for a moment, thinking about Freddie. It occurred to Louis that one of the other boys had talked about wanting a kid for a while, but for some reason he couldn't remember who it was. It was odd not remembering details of that sort, they had been a band for 5 years, and yet he still forgot some of the little details. And lyrics.

Louis snorted to himself and entered his apartment. As he sat down on the sofa to watch football, it hit him. Harry had always wanted kids. Louis stared at the blank TV screen. He remembered all the times Harry would get excited when a kid was near. Louis tried to get rid of the thought, the pain of losing Harry was still very fresh. He turned on the TV and began to watch football, trying to forget about Harry as much as he could.

-

As Louis went to bed that night he found himself thinking about Harry again. Louis had hardly talked to the boys in months. Why was he thinking of Harry now? He thought about the up all nights and the nights Harry would poke him awake to tell him a joke or a thought, or the times they would just lay there and snuggle and talking. Louis cried himself to sleep trying hard not to think of Harry, but he couldn't.

Weeks went by. February turned into March and Harry was still constantly in Louis' mind. At first it was only occasional. A quick thought and then it was over with. But before Louis knew it Harry took up every inch of his mind, just like back in the One Direction days. He had not realized how much he actually missed Harry until now.

Louis could not bear it anymore. He sat on the sofa and contemplated on what he was going to do. He had already tried to move on from Harry by dating Brianna, and although he really liked her, she just wasn't the one for him. He could always try to get back in touch with Harry, it wouldn't mean they would necessarily date again but they could at least be friends. If Louis really wanted to he could probably see about calling up all the boys, but he also knew they were busy setting up their solo careers.

-

Louis decided he was going to see what his mum thought. Although she had a habit of overdoing things at times, she was usually pretty good at handling these things. He scrolled through his contact list on his phone until he reached the one labeled "Mum". He pressed it and hit the "call" button. It didn't ring long before his mum picked up.

"Hello?" came the voice on the other end.

Louis sighed trying to figure out a way to order his words. "Hey, mum, I was wondering if I uh- could come over this evening."

"Why of course you can!" Louis' mum began happily, "Is there a specific occasion?"

Louis leaned against a wall. "Well I wanted to talk to you about something, but I also figured I haven't stopped for a visit in a while."

"Well alright I'm looking forward to seeing you then." She responded. "Just leave me a message when you're on your way."

"Alright mum. Love you."

"Love you too."

Louis hung up the phone and pocketed it. He sighed. Knowing his mum she'd wanna keep him for the weekend, which would be nice since it would get him away from his empty apartment. He made his way to his bedroom and threw a few things in a bag, zipped it, and dragged it out to his car.

-

Louis embraced his mum in a tight hug when he entered the house. Harry briefly crossed his mind as he let go, but he shook it off quickly. Louis dumped his bag onto the floor by the door, causing his mum to shake her head.

"24 years old and a newborn yet you've hardly changed a bit." Louis' mum laughed.

Louis smiled and sat in his usual spot on the sofa. They talked for a while and caught up on the last few months. Then they watched TV. Louis tried to procrastinate the conversation that he was here to have in the first place, but eventually he just couldn't do it anymore.

"Hey mum?" Louis said at last. "You remember how I told you on the phone earlier that I wanted to talk to you about something?"

"Yeah. Are you wanting to talk about it now?"

"Uhm yeah well it's about Harry."

Louis' mum paused the TV. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I keep thinking about him and I don't know. I just don't know what to do. I think I miss him mum." Louis looked down and fiddled with his fingers.

Louis' mum watched him. "Are you still in contact with him?"

Louis cracked his knuckles and stared at the ceiling. "I mean sorta. I still have his contact and all that but I've hardly spoken to him."

"Why don't you leave him a message or something then?"

Louis stared at the floor. Of course his mum had told him the obvious. "Well I- I don't know really I suppose I could. I just don't know what he's doing anymore and wouldn't wanna bother him."

Louis' mum thought for a moment. "Well, I am still in contact with Anne..."

Louis looked up from the floor.

"...Why don't I see if I can have a chat with her and find out what he's up to, and then maybe we'll be able to get you two in contact again."

Louis' eyes lit up, causing his mum to smile. She got up and ruffled his hair, then left the room to go find out about Anne.

"Thank you mum!" Louis called

"You're very welcome Lou."

Louis spent the rest of the evening trying to carry on as usual, but he had trouble focusing on just that. He thought about Harry again. Imagining reuniting with his best mate again was exciting but also equally anxiety inducing. He wondered if  Harry would be happy to see him.

-

The next morning Louis came downstairs to see his mum sitting at the table, who seemed to be doing something on her laptop.

"Look who's awake!" Louis' mum said, looking in from her laptop.

Louis smiled a little and rubbed his eyes as he sat down at the table with her. "Morning"

Louis' mum brought Louis a plate of breakfast, of which was still quite warm, and sat it down in front of him.

"Thanks," Louis mumbled as he began to eat

Louis' mum smiled and sat back at her and watched him. They sat in silence until Louis was almost done, and then she spoke again.

"Anne messaged me back last night."

Louis almost choked on the last bit of food he was swallowing. "You did?"

Louis' mum nodded. "I haven't asked her about Harry yet though."

Louis' mum noticed the slight disappointment in Louis' face. "I know you wanna get back in touch with him soon Lou, but I want to have a chat with her first. We're friends too you know."

Louis nodded. "I know mum. He's probably busy writing songs or something anyway."