Wake Up

Chapter 8

After grabbing house keys, and locking the front door, the two men took a cab to a little ways outside of the city. Upon arriving, they paid the driver and made their way up a small grassy hill with a bench. Dan didn't know where they were but he trusted Phil knew, and took in the lovely view nonetheless. It was the time of evening when the sun had set, and the sky was painted with deep blues, purples, and pinks. The stars looked like scattered bits of glitter on a big blue canvas, and the moon was bright but hidden away behind the shadow of the clouds.
Phil pulled his hood up, and laid in the grass covered in a coat of snow, with his hands comfortably resting on his stomach. He looked up at Dan, and gently patted the empty spot next to him. Dan slightly hesitated before doing the same. They both laid in the snow, staring up at the sky, and getting lost in their minds.
"You know," Phil spoke softly, "the moon doesn't glow on its own, it's just reflecting the sun."
Dan faced Phil, and swallowed nervously before sighing quietly.
"Like me," he said softly.
He looked back up at the sky.
"What?" Phil asked, facing Dan with a confused look.
Dan panicked, and cleared his throat.
"What I meant was," Dan said nervously, "the sun is alone, but it still shines. Like you."
Phil looked at Dan looking up at the sky, and he thought back to that time they kissed at the bar on Halloween. He remembered the feeling of Dan's lips on his, and Dan's heart beating rhythmically against his own. But when he thought about it more, he couldn't bring himself to believe it. That wasn't love. Just drunk love, where both their minds weren't thinking clearly. If Dan couldn't remember their kiss, then it probably meant nothing.
"Phil, you okay?"
Phil blinked back to reality to realize he had been staring at Dan for a while, and he faced the sky again, not saying anything in return. Dan took the hint, and turned his head away to rekindle his thoughts. If the world was going to end and there would be no tomorrow, he made up his mind to tell him now.
Dan slowly turned his face to Phil again, and he collected all of his courage into the words he was about to say in one breath.
"Phil, I—"
"Dan, look!" Phil exclaimed, pointing upward, towards the star whizzing past them. "A shooting star!"
Dan watched the small star make its journey across the sky, and then looked to his side at Phil settling back into the snow with his eyes squeezed shut.
Dan was about to question him, but he understood what Phil was doing. He had to admit, Phil looked very cute when he did things like that. It made him look like an innocent child. Soon, Phil's body relaxed as he laid back down on the grass.
"What did you wish for?" Dan asked. 
Phil faced him again, and his smile turned to a slight frown. He sighed almost sadly.
"Something that I can't have," he said in a low and sad tone.
Dan's tongue was suddenly replaced with sandpaper as his mouth went completely dry. Something he can't have, or someone he can't have?
"Oh," was all Dan could say.
Phil huffed and sat up.
"Let's go home," he said, and Dan sat up as well, feeling confused as to why Phil seemed so upset.

A long cab drive later, they were home, and Dan collapsed onto the sofa while Phil headed to his bedroom, but he stopped.
"Dan," Phil questioned, "wasn't there something you wanted to tell me?"
Dan looked up at him, and his mouth once again went dry. If he knew the wish Phil made was about him, why didn't he just confess now? Easy. He just couldn't.
"It was nothing," Dan said, shaking his head.
Phil sighed, and gave a half forced smile.
"Well, good night," Phil said before heading to his bedroom.
Once there, Phil flopped onto his bed, and his mind started to wander. He felt kinda dumb that he didn't have the courage to say what he wanted, but it wouldn't make sense. How could it? Best friends aren't supposed to fall in love with each other. Maybe, occasionally, a bunch of girls could tell their friends they love them, but for guys, there was only brotherly love. But it made Phil feel sick to think of Dan as a brother.
"I guess there's no future for us," Phil spoke softly, as a tear rolled out of his eye and down his cheek.
Phil couldn't help feeling what he felt, but he knew that if he continued to live with Dan, those feelings would grow stronger. If only there was a way they could just disappear. Then Phil's mind went blank with realization.
"Wait," he said, sitting up on his bed with new knowledge on what to do.
He grabbed his phone and went into the App Store. He searched for the app that would solve his problem. Once downloaded, he started swiping.