just a bunch of drafts, catch the rift ! most likely won't be any part 2's because half of them are already books. just chapters that i wrote but didn't like.
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for some reason it felt like i'd been gone for weeks. in reality it's only been two days. i just miss my baby. she's been on my mind so heavily since the moment i got on that plane.
extra heavy since i landed.
but after a long trip of visiting my friends i'm finally back home for her. and it's valentine's day.... early in the morning. i'm pretty sure she's asleep, not even thinking about the fact that i'm back. i wouldn't be surprised if she'd forgotten. it won't upset me because...it's literally 3am.
my baby likes to get her sleep.
i used my key to open the door to our house, struggling with my suitcases. two days worth of clothes with my friends are a weeks worth for anyone else. we switched outfits like three times a day based on what activity we did.
it was amazing. but we had to separate on this day to be with our boos. celebrated together with a galentines and the real day is left to us to be with those that we love.
after almost falling a good number of times i sighed leaving those suitcases at the door for later. i'm so tired even though i slept the whole plane ride. the fact that it's so dark could be a reason. my body reacts to the vibe of the day.
speaking of dark, this house was pitch black. i wasn't here so she was able to do that. bey knows that i'm gonna have a little light on. whether it's the lamps or the stove or hall light. i'm the type to get up in the middle of the night so i need it.
i sighed going to the kitchen and looking around. just the way i left it. yes. wouldn't know what to do if she brung her ass in my kitchen trying to cook shit. i made her promise that she would wait until i got back and just eat out for two days.
what a success.
although it's 3am, i was thinking about going to the store and getting my baby something for valentine's day. at first i was gonna take her shopping but i wanna surprise her with flowers and stuff. it'll be so cute. and i know a shop that's literally always open.
i've never seen that flower shop close. ever.
i quietly went upstairs and grabbed a jacket from my closet before leaving. she was looking so cute in that bed but i couldn't kiss her because she would've woken up.
sighing, i pulled into the little parking lot and got out. the lady inside seemed surprised to have a customer but i started to look around. there were valentines decorations all over. i cooed at a couple because they were so cute.
baby loves yellow so i got her the bouquet of yellow roses. they were fake. i can't get any real ones i don't want her to break out or nothing in case she's allergic.
on top of that i got some chocolates and also this cute bear. it was yellow too. this little shop is lit. i didn't think they had such cute things like this.
there was a photo book and i got that. i'm gonna go print some stuff out asap. the cvs around here opens around 4am. i'll catch them quick.
after checking out of there i sat in the parking lot for a while before driving off. had to take pictures of the stuff and record what i was doing for memories. thankfully the cvs was just opening. the girl that works there is really cool and i went to school with her. nice.
"hey. i just wanna print some pictures off."
"oh ok go ahead."
i walked deeper inside to the photo area. crazy i'm doing all this at 4am but hey. whatever for mine. and i look good, got my hair done. cute deep curls. she's gonna love everything. from the gifts to the way i'm looking for her.
the photo book took a good number of pics so i printed enough. after that i paid and left. i need to get home before bey wakes up to pee or some shit and remember that i'm supposed to be home.
imagine her not seeing me home when i'm supposed to....after two days of being gone. she's gonna tear me to shreds then put me back together to tear me apart some more.
sitting in the cvs parking lot, i put all the pictures inside the book and used a random pen to write cute messages around the pages. she's gonna really like this. bey enjoys sweet gifts. something she can cherish and look back at.
that's something i literally love about her. giving gifts is a love language of mine, so i've been able to give her things to cherish for years while enjoying it as well.
"aw this is cute." i spoke to myself once done. okay onika, get home. you don't wanna be cursed out for trying to do something nice.
i sped all the way there. when i pulled in the driveway i was happy to see no lights on. but as soon as i got out....a light popped on. i cursed under my breath and huffed, still grabbing everything.
man. she should've stayed her butt asleep. before i could get to the front door my phone started to ring. my eyes widened seeing her call, but i cringed too. oh man.
it pained me not to answer.
i couldn't go through the front door so i went through the path to the back. she'll hear the front door but the back door is a slider so it won't be loud.
tip toeing in, i went to the couch. sitting everything up was kinda hard but i got it done without her coming down. i could hear her walking around upstairs, i knew she was mad. my phone kept going off. i couldn't turn a light in so my flashlight was all i had.
once i knew it was looking ok, i took a deep breath, taking a picture with the flash on.
"onika you got me fucked up! since when don't you answer your phone?!" i heard her scream from upstairs. it scared me, i jumped a bit. well there goes the voicemails. honestly it made me laugh. "baby seriously, you're making me scared now. i see your car but you're not home..." she was coming down.
i rushed to the kitchen, making sure she couldn't see me and pressed record on my phone. she looked like she'd just gotten out the bed, i giggled. her pajama shorts were twisted, her hair was messy and she had sleep in her face.
"so beautiful." i whispered in the camera. she hadn't noticed the gifts on the couch yet but when she went to call or text me again, she glanced over.
"what the hell?" she noticed, next looking around until her eyes landed on me coming out. a huge smile spread across her face.
"good morning my love. happy valentine's day."
"aw...don't check your phone." she cringed but still held her arms out for me. i hugged her, rubbing her back softly as she rocked us. "i cursed you out like ten times in five minutes."
"yea i heard you." i chuckled pulling away, wiping the crust out her eye.
"what's all this? when did you have time?"
"i honestly didn't have time, but i got it done. it's just something small until we get our day started." i pulled her to the couch and sat her down. she grabbed the bear with so much admiration.
see? she's gonna cherish that bear forever and ever.
"i love you so much, i'm gonna cry."
"don't cry bey...i love you too."
"you're so sweet." she grabbed the photo book to look through it. i watched all the emotions run through her the more she looked. my baby had thick tears dripping from her eyes.
aw....
"this is best gift i've ever been given."
"it's all for you baby." i grabbed her face and pecked her lips.
