just a bunch of drafts, catch the rift ! most likely won't be any part 2's because half of them are already books. just chapters that i wrote but didn't like.
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that feeling of regret never settles. no matter how much you try to cover it up, make it seem like everything's good, it'll always hit you somewhere else. i hate regret. i try my hardest not to regret anything in my life, but it's hard. the hardest thing ever.
especially when that regret is towards someone you have to see everyday. you wake up with this person, get ready with them, eat with them and the biggest of all, sleep with them. but the only difference, it doesn't feel the same way it did before.
you think about the regret as you wake up, brush your teeth, take a bite of food, and even as you try your best to burst the orgasm worked for. it's permanent.
"good morning."
"good morning bey." i sighed rubbing my face before getting out of bed beside her, making our way to the bathroom. our his and hers sinks held our essentials. we brushed our teeth, softly watching one another through the mirror. next moving to wash our faces.
it was like a routine. we moved at the same time, doing the same things. sort of like a robot. that ai.
she followed me out the bathroom to our closet, us parting ways to each of our sides. finding clothes that somehow ended up matching in the slightest way possible. all we could do was smirk while heading to our dressers.
i looked over myself, thinking of what jewelry could compliment me today. the weather in chicago allowed me to dress covered, a sweater and leather pants would do me well.
thought that maybe i didn't need any jewelry.
not to my surprise, we decided the same. heading out our room and down the hallway to get our little man up, his day being ahead of ours. preschool was calling his name.
"chubbyyy bunnnyyy." i cooed while tipping in his room, watching as he shut his eyes tightly, pretending to be asleep like every morning. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't tired of the same thing everyday. but it's what made my little one happy. "aww, looks like he's sleeping baby....i guess no school today."
"no mommy! i want school!" his messy head of curls popped up from under the covers and he gave us the biggest smile ever. reaching his arms out for beyoncé to grab him, which she did.
like every morning.
i stood close to her body to show our love bug some love. he laid his head on his mamas shoulder while admiring the two of us. it felt unreal; to have such an obsessed son that admired his parents every second he could. it was the kind of the love i drew out for myself as a junior high student.
perfection. but little did i know, nothings perfect.
