Not Your Best Friend

Moving Forward, Moving On

Nani

After Avan left Jackson and me in his apartment to talk, I called it quits again. I meant it then; I really did; I wanted to be done, but it was not long before we ended up back in bed. Nevertheless, it turns out he wasn't just in my bed; a girl who had been hanging around a lot lately came up to confront me. I was so taken aback by the encounter that, at first and then, I couldn't believe she was costing me like I was some sort of homewrecker. It turns out they had been dating for a while. It literally broke my heart to hear that. I couldn't believe he was spouting all this nonsense about not wanting to be in a relationship. But I guess that is what I signed up for. I mean, we were just friends who had sex. In the end, I really was just sex for him, and this was the last straw.

After that confrontation, I didn't say anything to him; I just stopped speaking. For a while, he would blow up my phone, calling and texting, but I never responded. I felt so stupid. After finding out about his little girlfriend, I took a little time for myself, and I've been away. I hadn't talked to Jackson in over a month, and even when I came back to town, I had yet to see or hear from Jackson. Avan called a few times. I let him know I was okay but needed this time to myself. It's funny how someone who is supposed to be your best friend lied to you. The funny thing is I hear they are still together; that day at Avan's house was complete bullshit now that I think about it. I wish I had never admitted my feelings. No, I wish I had never started down this road of a friend with benefits, but I thought I could handle it. I did learn one thing for sure: Jackson was not my best friend, and I don't know if he ever was. As much as that realization hurts, I am finally moving on with my life.

***

Neomia

After that night, I hadn't talked to my so-called best friend in months. My sister, along with Jay and Chris, comforted me. I basically cut him out of my life and focused on work. He had cut me deep, but I wasn't going to lie. A huge part of me really missed him. Sometimes, I'd be sitting on the couch going through an article and remembering all the times I used to edit at his house, and he would try to distract me. I smile at the memories, but then I want to cry. I always said that I was saving myself for that special someone and Jake being my best friend for all these years, and when he admitted he had feelings for me, yes, he was the one who told me about his feelings. Like a dumbass, I fell for it, accepted my feelings, and gave him my most precious gift. Even after all the BS, I still slept with him again after he put through a part of me still wants him, but I'm better than that, and the fact that he could do that to me just shows we grew out of whatever type of friendship we did have. I didn't need or want him in my life anymore. My phone rings, and I look to see that it's Jay. We have been hanging out a lot lately. I know all about the drama with Nise and Chris; Jay has been a really good friend. I hoped one day, he would forgive them and go back to being friends with them both. I know Chris is a good guy, or I wouldn't be so happy that the two idiots finally decided to date. I loved my sister, but she and Chris should have started dating a long time ago, but they were too busy running around each other and their feelings.

I am sad that Jay got hurt in the process, though; I loved their friendship when we were in high school. The three of them showed me what a real friendship looked like. I hate that feelings caused them to grow apart. But, speaking of Jay. He called to let me know he was outside I grabbed my things and locked up. For now, I am done with dating and best friends and all that. Right now, I am just enjoying life and spending time with those who have proven to have my back. Jay has really been my rock through all of this. I smile when I think about all our years writing letters. Our friendship has really grown now that he's back. He waves and opens the passenger door for me before getting in the driver's seat and taking off.

Porshia

After my talk with my ex about his talk with Rah, I thought we would talk, but it's been months since that talk, and Rah has not reached out to me. It wasn't that I miss us dating; I was missing my best friend, the guy who was there for me through everything when I was out thoting, when I got serious with my ex, and when I had my son. I truly hoped that I hadn't hurt him and that this was the end of our friendship. I know I feel all this, but I was giving him his space, so I was not contacting him. I can't lie; the silence and disappearing act hurts. I was getting ready to pick up my son from his father, and just as I was making my way out the door, I opened it, and there stood Rakim.

"Hey, can we talk," he says

"Sure"

I let him in, and we were in the living room. I sat on the couch while he still stood, and I wondered if this was it for us.

"When I told you how I felt, I knew there was a chance I would be rejected. You and Nico have a child, so you know I knew I could be rejected, but then you didn't reject me. I thought, could this really work? Then you and Nico kissed. I thought I knew it was too good to be true."

"Rah?"

"I need to get this off my chest."

"But..."

"P, just let me finish."

"After Nico and I talked, I had to think long and hard about what happened between the two of you and what I wanted moving forward."

"And what do you want."

"I want you, P, but I need to know that you are all in. I'm done playing games." I cut him off by kissing him. He grabbed me and pulled me closer. Needing air, we break apart.

"I'm all in," I say

I pulled him over to the sofa, and we talked. I had to call Nico to keep our son for another night while we talked and made up for lost time.

*****

Nicole

K and I have been; sometimes, I don't know what we are doing. I knew I wanted to be with this man, but sometimes, I think I should have kept it professional. I mean, I could handle a few groupies. It's just that one who doesn't seem to know her place. I tried not to let it get to me, but it sometimes did. I was sitting at home on my laptop working for home and scheduling some events and meet and greet for another client. I was so focused on my work that I didn't hear K come in. I felt a kiss on my cheek, and I looked up to see him standing there with food from my favorite restaurant.

"Wow, thank you," I say

"Wow, really, Nic."

"What," I ask

"What's with the attitude lately?

"I have no idea what you are talking about, K."

"Nic, you have been acting distant since the meet and greet."

I just look at him. I mean, what was I supposed to say? I'm tired of seeing the groupie; I know you slept with it everywhere we go.

"Nic, you gonna answer me," he says

"I don't know what you are talking about, K. I haven't been acting like anything."

"Now, Nic, how long have we known each other? I could have sworn we were best friends, so I know when you aren't being honest."

I sigh

"What's up, Nic? When did you stop being able to talk to me."

"Since we began this," I say, gesturing between us

"But I thought you wanted this," he says

"But do you want it?"

"What?" he says

"Is this what you want?" I ask

"Why wouldn't it be?" he asks

"Come on, K, remember we are best friends. And when I told you about my feelings, you didn't feel the same way. You didn't say anything until Dave came around."

"Nicole, I know I didn't give you the response you wanted when you first told me your feelings, but at that time, I was still fooling around with other women, and I owed you more respect than just adding you to a list of women I was fooling with."

I look away, and he gently grabs my face.

"Look at me. I want you. I am in this for the long haul if you will have me."

He bends down and kisses me; I can't help but respond to the kiss. Soon, I'm on my back, and he's on top of me, still kissing. We break for air, and we stare into each other's eyes. I can't help but fall even more in love with my best friend, well now boyfriend.

"I love you," I say

"I love you too," he says before kissing me again.  We still had some things to work on but I know we will be good.