Same but... different (Lestappen and Carlando)

Chapter 28

POV: Carlos

We spend the evening with my parents, and talk a lot. It's so comforting for me to be surrounded by so many people I love, and most importantly that I can truly be myself with. After the dinner, I went to my mom, letting her now that Lando is now aware of my sexuality, but nothing else, warning her to not say anything that would embarrass me.

Lando and I then decide to not watch a movie tonight, as we already did that a huge part of the day. We settle on playing some board games, and I find out that we're both very competitive, in this domain also.

— You wanna play chess? I ask him suddenly, knowing I have huge chances of winning.

— Yeah, why not!

The sun is still not set and I take advantage of the luminosity of the evening to take a quick picture of the Brit, his cheeky smile making me laugh. I share it with his approval in my story, knowing that our fans are gonna get crazy.

I feel proud winning, even though my last game of chess with Charles ended up on me losing, because knowing that I'm still better than Lando is reassuring. Not that I want him to lose, but I prefer winning. I'm sure he also does anyways.

— Told you I was not trained enough, I never play! He whines as I win, frustratingly falling back on his chair but still smiling.

— Don't worry, if you play with me more often you're gonna get better... eventually, I add with a wink, making him gasp indignantly.

— Hey, I heard that! Anyways, he says with a sassy voice, wanna see something cool? The designer of my helmets just sent me the first draft for my special helmet, for Silverstone!

I nod excitedly and he shows me the picture, and I have to admit that it looks fairly good. But that's not what I focus on, as a notification suddenly pops on the screen. I awkwardly try to ignore it, as I don't want to spy on him, but the human brain makes it very difficult to not read words when they are just in front of your eyes.

And what I read leaves me perplex. It's apparently from Lando's friend Max Fewtrell, or at least that's what I guess from the original name contact "Quadrant gnome". I have time to quickly read it, and it simply says "Hey man! Don't overthink it too much, yk? I'm sure you'll find out if it's just friendship or... something more. I went through the same thing with my girlfriend for a while too, so don't worry, I know you're gonna figure it out. I support you no matter what"

My mouth becomes dry, my breath stuck in my throat. I feel my head spinning a little, I don't understand the meaning of the text but I feel some weird sensation in me. It indicates me that there's something very important to understand, but my mind can't seem to function. I feel numb, lost in some kind of emotional storm.

— Oh sorry, it's Max spamming ahah! I hear a slight concern in Lando's voice, as he quickly makes the notification disappear.

— 's alright, I finally manage to say, trying to force my attention back on the picture.

But the words are like printed behind my eyelids, I can't shake the thought that the text provoked. First, I felt kind of hurt that the Mclaren driver had preferred to talk to someone else than me, if he was feeling bad or having some kind of worries. I thought he knew he could trust me, and felt some kind of betrayal overpowering me.

I also felt very sad and jealous reading that he was actually considering having feelings for someone, my blood boiling just imagining who that lucky person could be. Because as much as I want Lando to feel happy, I'd much prefer if it was with me.