During dinner some of my friends sit with us. We talk about school days, how we used to chat during classes by writing on our copies, playing GTA Vice city in computer lab instead of typing in word, school picnics and tours, dancing in annual programs etc. It feels nostalgic. It actually feels good to connect with people you grew up with.
And after dinner, our tour planner tells us to get back to bus as we have to travel whole night.
I call Dr. Nishan as soon as I get in the bus. Of course, to follow up about my patients.
"Hi Dr. Shruti. How's the trip going?'' He asks as soon as he picks up.
"It's going great. I just had dinner. Have you eaten?" I reply and ask.
"Not yet been busy." He sighs.
"Just wanted to ask about my patients." I say.
"I talked with Dr. Supriya. Everyone is good and everything is under control." He says and I take a breath of relief.
"Tell me more about the trip." He says.
As I am about to tell him about Rachana, Samar comes in and sits beside me.
"It's just... I wish you were here." I say out of nowhere.
"I wish that too!" He surprises me.
"Dr. Shruti. I've to go now." He says in hurry and before I say something, the call is cut. Maybe it's an emergency.
Samar turns to me and smiles. I smile back.
"Boyfriend?" He asks.
"Umm, yeah!" I lie. I'm lying to support the lie I lied this morning.
"Great!" He smiles.
"Actually, I was worried for you after you know, Kabir and you broke up." He says, making my heart beat so fast.
"You were?" I chuckle. I still remember, nobody stood up for me except Razz.
"Kabir was always a playboy. Whatever he did to you was wrong. But I'm happy you moved on." He says, breaking my heart. Little does he know, what I went through just because of that break up. Did Kabir let him tell these things to me?
I want to say so much but I don't want to show my weakness to him.
"What about you? Girlfriend?" I ask.
"Engaged!" He says proudly showing me his ring.
Didn't his fiancé leave him? Or did he get engaged to someone else again? I really should Razz about it.
"So sweet!" I manage to say. He just smiles.
It's 9:30 P.M. The bus is moving on its pace. The inside of the bus is dark, some people are talking in low voice and people are sleeping. I look at the front seat, Razz is sleeping on Sam's shoulder. Sam also looks asleep too. Samar's eyes are also closed, don't know if he's asleep or listening to songs.
I look outside the window. Some people are closing their stores filled with watermelons. Some people are walking on the road. The cold air passes, making me shiver. I try to sleep but I can't. It's too uncomfortable to sleep like this.
"I'm bored!" I text Dr. Nishan without thinking anything. 10 minutes passes but no response. Maybe he's busy.
I think of the encounter I had with Kabir's wife. I wish I could know how Kabir felt after seeing me. Did he ever regret leaving me like that? If he had, he would have apologized to me. I wonder how he met his wife. I know I have to talk to him during this trip, but how? I won't be able to move on if I don't end this.
My phone vibrates, making me come out of my over thinking world. I immediately look at my phone and sigh when I see Reeta's text.
"How's trip going Shruti?" Her text says.
"Fine till now. How was your day?" I reply.
"As usual. I just got home." She says.
"Was there any kind of emergency?" I ask her.
"No!" She immediately replies. If there was no emergency why did Dr. Nishan left like that?
"Did you talk with that guy?" She texts again, referring to Kabir.
"Not yet. However, his wife is pregnant." I tell her.
"I can feel the gynecologist in you is worried for her." She says with a laughing emoji.
"You know me!" I too say with laughing emojis.
"Anyways Shruti, I'll get going. Have fun. Good night!" She says.
"Good night Reeta." I reply and close my phone.
I turn to my right and see Samar, staring blankly on the ground. He doesn't even blink his eyes. I don't know for how long he's been this way. I nudge on his shoulder and he startles. He blinks his eyes as soon as he sees me. And out of nowhere, his eyes are filled with tears.
"Are you okay?" I immediately ask him.
"Yes. I dozed off." He says, rubbing the tears. I want to tell him that his eyes were opened but choose not to.
"You're not asleep?" He asks.
"It's too uncomfortable and I'm bored." I tell him the truth.
"I'm a very boring seat partner, right?" He chuckles.
"I didn't mean it that way." I defend myself.
"Want to listen to some of my songs?" He asks and I can't say no. I nod and he gives me one of his airpod.
I look at him as I hear him singing. He has such a nice voice. He smiles at me. As I focus on the song, I realize the lyrics is too sad. Too sad that it hurts. I can't stop remembering all the things Kabir did to me. The promises he made to me and the way he broke my heart.
You're just a pretty liar...
"It's so beautiful." I say as soon as the song ends.
"I wrote it myself." Samar proudly says.
"Wow, you're a dentist, a singer and a lyrics writer too." I am impressed.
"Want to listen to other songs too?" He asks.
"Of course!" I say and he plays other songs too.
Both of us are quiet, listening to the songs. Whenever a sad song comes, I think of Kabir's betrayal and whenever a love song is played, I can't stop thinking of Dr. Nishan. It's not like I'm in love with him but I can't stop picturing us living the song.
Then as a song ends, a voice note plays. It's Samar's voice. It sounds like he is crying. It sounds personal so I turn to Samar. His eyes are closed. I nudge him again but this time he doesn't wake up. He's sleeping.
"Darling... Why did you leave me? What am I going to do without you? How am I going to live? After all the plans we made for our future, how could you just leave like that?" Samar's voice note is playing.
It's too personal, I can't listen to it. I immediately take his phone and pause it. I take off the air-pod from my ear. Then I keep his phone and the air pods in his pocket.
My heart breaks just thinking about the voice note. If his fiancé left him, why is he still wearing the engagement ring?
