𝑔𝓇𝑒𝑒𝓃 (A Taylor Swift adoption story)

(no) (Chapter 29)

I have a new obbsesion in reneé rap. someone give fic recomendations plzzzzz

Trigger warnings- panic attack, kinda descriptive ngl, somewhat overstimulated. Also John, so like, take with that what you will.

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WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MAN DOING IN A SCHOOL!?!?!

"Uh, hello." I say, my voice coming out in an almost squeak.

"Did you know my family lost our fostering license because of you?" He asks with a dismissive glare

"Did you know you guys deserve it and you suck?" I say almost mumbling. I can feel my lips quivering. I don't want to be here. I don't want to be in a room with him, I ran for a reason.

"Listen, Natalia," he says, using my full name, I hate that name. I can't stand that name. I want that name erased. I cut him off as soon as he says it.

"Don't call me that. You don't get to call me that." I say my voice trembling, and I realize suddenly how scared I am in this room.

The air suddenly feels heavy, and thick, filling and sitting in my lungs, hard, and hot. The shirt around my neck becomes constricting, and as the air fills my lungs, I feel as if it's tightening around me. The necklace I was so absentmindedly wearing a second ago now feels like a detrimental threat against my life.

My body feels as if it's underwater, my lungs unable to work properly, my vision becoming cloudy and blurry as I focus only on a specific part of the wall, my brain shutting off. I feel myself gasping for air slightly, and I stand, confused, tears forming in my eyes as I choke on the painful nothingness.

I don't want to be here.

I don't want to be in this room with this man, with this air, with this brain that won't work properly again.

I just want to go home. I don't even know where home is though.

Am I going to be alone forever?

God, I'm so alone.

I'm alone.

My parents are gone. My dad is gone. My brother is gone. My, my mom is gone.

I'm alone, I have no other family, none that wants me at least.

AJ didn't like me enough to wait for me to visit him, or tell me had a girlfriend or something.

I have no friends anymore, I bet Sierra only talks to me because of Taylor.

Taylor.

Taylor likes me... right?

She's not alone. She has so many people.

Billions.

I don't want billions.

I just need one.

Maybe Taylor is that one.

I hope Taylor is that one.

"Talia? Talia?" A voice interrupts my thoughts, and I feel a hand on my shoulder, I look over and see an unfamiliar woman looking at me, her peppery light brown hair in a somewhat disgruntled low ponytail, glasses framing her oval face as she looks at me distressed.

"Wh-what?" I say, my voice shaky, as I struggle to catch my breath, sitting on the floor of the office, John out of the room.

"Talia, I need you to breathe OK? It's important that you breathe." The woman says softly, her voice is calming, and I take in a few shaky breaths.

"OK, Talia, I'm going to ask you a few simple questions, is that OK? You don't have to answer them out loud if it's to hard, as long as your answering somehow." She says, and I nod. My breaths becoming slightly calmer.