Tainted Pages

Mount Everest

I trekked across the snow, my hands shaking from the cold. I could see my breath with every step that I took and my nose turned a bright red.

"Where am I?" I asked myself.

I was on what seemed to be a mountain layered with snow. The only thing was I couldn't see where the top of the mountain was, nor the bottom.

My stomach grumbled and I suddenly wished I had something to eat. Anything would do. I kept climbing up, unsure of why. I kept climbing till my feet hurt and then continued. I climbed until I could barely breathe, but never stopped. I climbed until I started to cough up blood and yet all I did was momentarily take a break.

"Stop. Just stop! Why are you still walking?" I yelled at myself, suddenly growing frustrated.

"Why are you pursuing something you'll never finish?! Just stop already!" I screamed, smacking the sides of my head and giving myself a headache.

The cold stung the inside of my throat like a spear in my neck. I coughed up more blood. My head throbbed uncontrollably. Finally I kneeled on the ground and gasped for breath.

"Just give up already." I told myself.

So I did. I laid in the snow on my back. The wind blew at me uncomfortably but at least now I wasn't wasting my breath. I  watched as the snow fell and covered me. My eyes were barely able to open, but I could still see myself being covered. I would die here, I knew that. I shut my eyes tightly, not wishing to see myself being buried alive.

"Maybe next time I won't pursue something that will never work." I said, sucking a breath in through my chattering teeth.

"Or maybe next time I'll be stronger."

I faded away into absolute bliss.

"Yes, next time I'll be stronger. For myself."

I heaved my last breath and stared into the darkness ahead. It was consuming me slowly. I died here. With this relationship I am now gone. No more. I cease to exist. I think that's okay, because no one really liked the old me.

I'll miss the days when this mountain grew green grass and trees full of fruit. I'll miss the sun shining down on me and the river nearby that I could rehydrate myself with.

But most importantly I'll miss you.