The Sibirian Express - COMPLETE

Chapter 16

I slowly turn my head to the side and look up. Not sure if my eyes are playing a trick on me. I blink a few times just to make sure. 

"Ivan." A whisper escapes my lips. He leans down towards me. Our eyes say everything we are incapable of saying right now. 

"Lexa, I ... I know you hate me, but I just had to see you." 

Unable to find the words, I just keep staring at him. That perfectly cut face I thought I'd never see again. 

"I am so so sorry, I have been drinking and I couldn't control myself . I am so so soory." 

By now tear had started to stream down my face again. Ivan reaches out to wipe the tear away, but as his hand approaches I subconsciously flinch away. 

He pauses and I can literally see him breaking on the inside. 

"I don't hate you ..." It was nothing more than a soft whisper, but he heard it. His eyes pierce mine. 

"You don't?"

I wanted to hate him. I've tried so hard the last few weeks ... believe me I've tried everything, but youre burned into my head."

A giggle escapes my lips and Ivan gives me a confused look, but I turn away fro him. "We're certainly not going to talk about it here" I say coldly, caressing the engraving on Mickey's stone with my fingers. 

"He was very important to you?" I let my head fall down as I try to find a more comfortable position on the grass. 

"Yes, he was like the father I never had. I was all alone for a while when Mickey found me and took me in. He taught me everything I know today." He carefully puts his hand on my shoulder when he notices that tears are welling up in my eyes again. 

"Exactly three years ago, Mickey had heart problems and was actually planning to retire. A man called Clubber Lang suddenly appeared and challenged Rocky to fight him. Mickey tried to change Rocky's mind, but in the end he was persuaded to train Rocky one last time. We were all in the locker room when Clubber started to provoke Rocky again. One thing led to another. There was yelling and shoving and somehow Mickey got in the middle and got knocked out. He got a heart attack ... I begged Mickey to let me take him to the hospital, but he ignored me and soley focused on getting Rocky in the ring ... He died in the locker room. He died in my arms."

As I lift my head, I can clearly see in Ivan's eyes what was going through his mind. He finally understood why I was against the fight with Apollo and why I completely broke down like that when he was in my arms. 

"I'm very sorry about your loss. I'm sure he was a good man."

A tiny smile curves my lips. "He was the best."

For the next few mnutes we just sit next to each other in silence and I hate the fact that I missed him so much, but I'm well aware that things can't go back to the way they once were. Not only what he did to Apollo, but also what he did, well almost did to me.

I rise slowly after kissing Mickey's gravestone goodbye. Ivan immediately follows me as we leave the cemetery. "I don't hate you Ivan, but I don't think we should see each other anymore. You need to focus on boxing and I ..."

Well, to be honest I have no idea what's going to happen to me. Apollo hates the whole world. I can't face Mary Ann anymore and I still don't know if Rocky and Adrian know about Ivan and I. 

"Lexa ... I am so sorry." I hear his voice in the distance as I walk away, leaving him behind.