so... I have been into this friend ever since. And I feel like I do seem to still hold feelings for him. Although, I don't really think it would work out. Maybe I'll ask him out when I graduate college, I'm taken by fictional men for now, haha I know. But dang... At the same time, I don't think it will work out. Judging from my past relationship with my ex, it seems that he'd just be the same. I think he'd probably just brush off my feelings as "cringey" and "immature". Plus, I don't think I really like myself all too well to start a relationship, and I'll probably just be an inadequate girl who will just be his last resort at the end of the day, most I'll probably get is just him seeing me as an awful bitch, who is horny all the time, takes advantage of people and always whines and complains when not given the things that she wants. Geez, I really am such a joke. I feel like if I ask him once again, if he hates me or something, I think I'd probably feel better if he said that he did.
But I'm pretty sure, it wouldn't work out. Not a chance, not at all. He's too logical, and I'm too abstract. He'd be so sure about how handle things, I wouldn't be able to at all. I'm just a pushover. In the end, probably for like forever, I'll just pine again. At the end of the day, I am still the same girl who I was 4 years ago...
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A Writer's Block
RandomThis is where I rant because I don't want to bother people. They'll just tell me things that will worsen my thoughts on myself. I'm tired of people offering comfort, only to shit on you when you ask for it, and that is what became of this book. Mf r...
