Vivi

XVII

Vivi had nightmares for several hours. She woke up in what she would call the middle of the night, in a cold sweat. The sun was just fading behind the earth as she sat up.

Vivi didn't want to go back to sleep until she'd shaken off the nightmares. Instead, she went for a walk on the palace roof under the mind-boggling stars. Gazing at the dull Andromeda galaxy and contemplating the myriad worlds it must contain almost felt like dreaming in and of itself.

At last Vivi felt sleepy again, and made back for her room.

Shockwave was sleeping fitfully too, Vivi saw as she passed him. She felt tenderness for him in that moment.

Tenderness for him?! He –

She pushed the thought away.

Vivi slept somewhat more soundly the rest of the night.

She woke up feeling kind of... off. Maybe it was the memory of the nightmares. Maybe it was the heaviness of her heart.

"Chamuel," said Vivi.

A minute later, Chamuel came.

"Um," said Vivi. "Tea?"

"Of course, miss Vivianne. Black?"

"Jasmine."

"Right away."

I don't really want tea. I'm just lonely.

I could make a companion robot.

Hell no.

Vivi was one of the rather large number of people who rejected the idea of emotionally bonding with non-sentient AIs out of principle.

I could make something sentient?

Uhhh... no. Not a can of worms I want to open right now.

Vivi dismissed this line of thought and went for a shower. That felt good, at least. Sensual.

She took the tea which Chamuel had left beside the rainforest pool and drunk it as she walked. She thought vaguely of going to the palace roof.

Shockwave was listening to music as Vivi passed him. "Good morning, Shockwave," said Vivi.

"What do you want," said Shockwave, his eyes dark. Murderer eyes.

"Um," said Vivi. Her only intention had been to acknowledge Shockwave's existence. "How are you?"

"How do you think I am?" said Shockwave.

"Grumpy?"

"Fuck you."

Vivi froze for several beats. It was too early in her subjective experience of the morning for this. "Seriously dude, what's with the attitude?"

"What's with keeping me fucking prisoner like some kind of freaky perverted supervillain?"

"Oh, I'm the supervillain now?"

"Oh, so you mean I'm a villain? You want to say that to me straight?"

"I don't know what else you'd call someone who blew up a classroom full of kids!"

Shockwave's eyes went very, very dark. He was all bottled up rage, swollen with it, his aura black and impenetrable. If Vivi had stared at someone like that, her power would have straight-up killed them.

"If you come back into my cell again," said Shockwave, "I will explode you and we'll see just how many extra lives you got, Morpheus."

*

Fuck fuck fuck, thought Vivi as she made her way to the cuddle room and buried her head in a pillow. Fuck. I blew it.

I blew it. I let myself get carried away. Now Shockwave will never open up to me.

He still might...

Do I even want him to? wondered Vivi. Don't I just want to change him? Or punish him?

Part of me does, of course. What he did was unforgivable.

So give him up to the police.

But he'll get the death penalty.

So what?

"Ughhh..." groaned Vivi aloud. Almost experimentally, she tried to manifest a teddy bear. Nothing. Maybe Shockwave really could kill me right now, she thought despondently.

I'm lonely, thought Vivi. I want... something.

Maybe...

Vivi wasn't sure. But more and more, there seemed to be a tug on her volition. Why not, thought Vivi. She made for the door, up the crystal staircase, put on a spacesuit, went through the airlock, and stepped out into the black sunny sky.