A Match of Ice and Fire

Chapter 31: Kaya

Tiger Whales.

'Kaya...'

 A warm cindery whisper makes me feel inside like there's a sun in my chest.

'Kaya, wake up...'

I roll over, coming round to the scent of cherry blossom and jasmine. I yawn and blink against the setting sun up at the sillhoutte of a boy with golden eyes.

He kneels over me shaking my shoulder gently. "Kaya, wake up, the Captian spotted Tiger Whales on the prowl of the ship!!"

The Firelords ship. 

He's not a boy, he's the firelord and he's got the scar  to prove it.

 I jump awake. 

Zuko steadies me. 

I shake him off, scowling . "You let me fall asleep again."

"I thought you were sun bathing," He protests innocently. 

"how convient for you, agian..." I mutter.

His grin is dazzling. So dazzling, i let it slide for once, my curious peaked, "What is it?"

Zuko doesnt answer. Instead, he grabs my hand, pulling me to my feet and racing down the length of the ship, tugging me with him. "Come on, you've got to come see, before they disappear!" 

he's so uncharacteristically excited agian, I let him pull me, still in shock.

We reach the prowl of the ship. 

"Look!"Zuko is pointing, fling his arms into the ocean. "See those red stripes?"

i squint agianst the setting sun.

A pack of silver humps with bright red stripes crest the sparkling sapphire waters of the southern seas, huffing mist.

"... There's a whole pod of them!" Zuko's beams so brightly  for a secound, i forget what the Tiger Whales remind me of and but the time they do, it's too late....

The tears are already falling

"...The captain said he hasn't seen any in over ten years!" Zuko raves excitedly. "All the crew thought they were exstinct. They're so rare. My father nearly hunted them to extinction. I saw a baby tiger whale, once, when I was very young, but it was dead." Zuko stumbles. "Well, dying. I was with my mother on Ember Island, and one got  stranded on the beach. I wanted to save the calf-cub but, the baby tiger whale was too heavy, there was nothing I could do and..."

Zuko trails off as i sniff, wiping at my eyes. it's no use. tears roll down my face, in an unstoppable torant. 

 "Oh, ah... sorry," Zuko panics, scrambling for a hankerchief in his robes. "I don't know why I told you that sad story, stupid! I mean, I tried my best to make the baby tiger whale comfortable, I got water from the sea and kept it cool under an umbrella, I went to get it something to eat, but the TigerWhale was so weak by the time i came back..."

The waves just keep coming. choking my throat. I need to get a grip. The whole crew can see me. The Firelord can see me. Zuko can see me. I need to be strong, fearsome. I have to be unbreakable.

"I'm sorry. I'll stop talking... Here," Zuko offers out his handkerchief,  so gently,  it  threatens to crumble me completely. "I'm sorry for upsetting you with the baby tiger whale, i don't know why i told you that-"

"I don't care about the baby tigerwhale!"

 I bat away  the hankerchief and scrub at my eyes raw till all the tears are gone. Everyone's looking at me. 

I wince.

 "I mean, i do care. That is really sad, but I'm not crying over that..." I look up at the sky "Ocean Spirit, I..." 

I force myself look anywhere.

 "I  just can't..." 

Anywhere other than the scorched shoreline along the southern Earth kingdom. 

"It's not--"

"it's alright," slowly Zuko slips the Hankechief back into his robe so quietly,  the action of it calms me. "you don't have to tell be if you don't want to."

"No," I say,  the choking riptide in my chest easing. "i want to."

Zuko waits as i take a deep breathe and face out to sea. 

"I saw Tiger Whales on the day I found my parents ashes... "

 Zuko face falls. With one sentence, All his boyish excitement shatters; replaced with crushing guilt, and I wish hadn't say it. Wished i hadn't said anything at all. why couldn't i have just kept myself together? Pretended for Zuko's sake. he could've been happy, without me, ruining the moment, a constant reminder of all his families atrocities.

"I know," Zuko starts, "This will never ever even begin to make up for anything you went through but I am so, so, sorry Kaya-"

"Please."

 I hold up my hand. 

"it's alright." 

I take another deep breath. watching as the red stripes dip below the waves on  the horizon. 

"If anything, The tiger whale were a silver lining.." 

Reflecting back on it now,  standing over my parents charred bones; knowing I'd spent three years searching for them, only to be too late. Not knowing if my brother was alive. Not sure if anyone from my tribe was alive. I forced the tremor out my voice, and say 

"I saw the Tiger Whales, and I told myself that even if everyone i held dear in this world died, there still be precious moments worth living for..." I exhale shakily as the Tiger Whales dive once and for all, tails vanishing into the depths.

Forcing me back to the present, to the future so daunting. To marrying the Firelord.

Zuko's studying me so intently, it's possible to tell what he's thinking, until he says it.

 "Your indominable."

I blink. then, half-laugh trying to shake off his unshakable gaze.

"I'm serious." Zukos eyes are blazing. "To go what you've gone through on your own, I can't even begin to imagine the relisance and the strength you had to carry on. Your indominable." 

And... I'm blushing. Spirit's curse me. The embarassment makes my face burn brighter as I desperately wish Zuko looked anywhere other than me. Because i feel anything but indominable.

"What is this?" i scoff, "The Firelord is in awe?" I tease trying hide my mortification. "Did I hit your head too hard with a snow ball? I knew i should have got easier on you this morning...."

"No Kaya, I didn't hit my head. I mean it. your Indominable." Zuko says softly in a way that makes my insides flutter traitorously like snow flakes.

 I shake myself out of it. I need a distraction. 

"I think you've made you're point, can we move on?"

"Your wish is my command, Princess."

 Zuko is grinning agian.

" you may distract yourself with kicking my butt a bit more before dinner, if you'd so desire."

"why thank you, your majesty," I grin back showing my teeth. "I would love too."