Seventeen Imagines

Wide Awake (T.W: Mention of suicide and blood!)

She's been crying in her room since earlier this morning, she can't help all her intrusive thoughts that's slowly eating her up, all the overthinking, all the trauma that's been haunting her in her sleep, that sometimes she just can't sleep at all, she tried going out and meet with her friends but, those doesn't help either.

She meets her boyfriend every now and then, but, it still doesn't help to stop the pain she's been feeling, it's already 10 in the evening, she hasn't eaten yet, she had lost her appetite and is now becoming thinner and thinner, her boyfriend is at a concert together with his members, Joshua, calls her most of the time when they are on your but, now, he can't seem to have the time to call her nor message her yet.

It made her overthink more, she misses him and yet she can't bring herself to call him thinking that she might be disturbing her busy Kpop idol boyfriend from Seventeen which is Joshua Hong. They've been together for 6 years and yet she still feels like a burden to him every time he would update her, making her even more hurt, she wants to let him go because she can't let go of the fact that maybe he'll get tired of her whining too and her sudden tantrums, and decide to leave her.

All her thoughts came to a halt when her phone started ringing, she saw that it was Joshua, she wiped her tears and tried to calm herself down so that he wouldn't hear her, she answered the phone and smiled at him, her eyes all puffy and red.

O.T.P
Italics - Joshua
Normal - You

You: Hi, Shua. How's the tour?

Josh: Did you cry? What happened?

You: Oh I... I was watching a movie... It was a sad one, the girl died because of suicide leaving her fiance all alone. That's all.

Josh: Are you sure?

You: Yes, of course.

Josh: Okay, anyways I just called to let you know that we'll be back to Korea in a few hours, I'm at the airport with the members, don't wait for me, I'll just go straight to your house and sleep beside you.

You: O-okay. Take care, I love you.

Josh: I love you too, so much. You mean the world to me, y/n-ah.

You: You too, Shua. Anyways, I'll hang up now I'll just clean my room.

Josh: Okay, babe. Bye! I love you 3000!

You: I love you 3000 too. Bye.

Call Ended.

After the call, she broke down again, she thought to herself again, how can she leave this man, how can she hurt this man who did nothing but love her with all his heart, make her feel that she's on top of the world and that she's sitting on a cloud nine, how can she leave him when he says those words.

She cried even more as the pain in her wrist starts to go back again, she looks down and sees the blood flowing out of her wrist, she lays down on her bed as the blood keeps oozing out of her wrist, she continues to cry all night, her white bedsheet being covered in blood until she finally feel sleepy, her eyelids gets heavier and heavier until she fell asleep while holding her last letter in her other hand.

Meanwhile, Joshua is practicing his speech for his surprise for y/n since he planned to get engaged with her already, he took out the red velvet box and opened it, he stared at the shining diamond on the top of the gold ring, he smiled to himself knowing his girlfriend would love this, he suddenly feel a pang on his chest as if telling him something bad had happened to her, he tried shaking it off until their plane land on Incheon airport.