Unfortunately Fortunate

Unknown and Unforgotten

The children were in the Reptile room, Monty had left to go shopping. The broken-hearted crocodile kept on crying "Woe is me."

Violet kneels down beside him with a smiling, saying. "Don't be sad. Uncle Monty will be down soon."

Elizabeth chuckes at Violet as Keira says, "He can't understand you."

"Dr. Montgomery said the broken-hearted crocodile's mating call just happens to sound like depressed human speech." Isadora continues after Keira.

"I know. Just like talking to it." Violet explains.

"I wish he'd go back outside. He's... annoying." Klaus grumbles.

"Woe is me." The crocodile says.

"Woe, is you? We're the ones whose parents perished in a fire and now we're being passed around like hot potatoes." Klaus says, getting frustrated.

"Look, Klaus. It can't understand you." Violet says, giggling slightly.

"I know that!" Klaus shouts at her, causing all the children to go quiet. Klaus took a deep breath and calmly spoke, "Sorry."

"Klaus, we know how you feel." Ducan says. "We're always gonna miss our parents. All of us. But... Monty's been a good guardian so far."

"And it seems like our parents really wanted us here." Violet tells Klaus.

"But that's just it. Our parents never mentioned Dr. Montgomery. Why did we never visit him? I thought we knew all our parents' friends. I thought we knew everything about them." Klaus says, frustrated.

"No one can know everything about another person. Everyone has their own story and secrets." Elizabeth explains.

"I'm sure they had a good reason for not telling us about Monty. Maybe it was the same reason they sent us to Briny Beach that day." Violet says.

"Or maybe there was a more sinister reason." Klaus says.

"What do you mean?" Sam asks Klaus, but then Monty walks in and smiles at the children.

"Bambini? Bambini! There you are. How was your day?" Monty asks them.

"Me and Duncan polished the tortoise, Sunny and Keira fed it some bananas and Klaus clipped the iguana's nails." Violet says. "And Elizabeth, Sam and Isadora cleaned the books and fed the lizards."

"Ah, thank you. I'm so grateful. Perhaps, when I'm out, you can lure the androgynous cobra out of my sock drawer." Monty says.

"Where are you going?" Isadora asks.

"Well, I'm gonna go into town and pick up a few things that I like to keep in stock. Wasp repellent, canned peaches, a fireproof canoe. And then, tonight, we'll go and see our first movie. Won't that be exciting?" Monty says.

"What movie are we seeing?" Keira smiles, excited to see her first movie.

"Well, we won't know until we get there." Monty says.

"I've never heard of a movie theatre that doesn't tell you what movie is playing." Klaus says.

"Klaus Baudelaire, I have a feeling there are many things that you're going to see that you've never heard of before. Life is a conundrum of esoterica." Monty tells Klaus before looking at two reptiles. "Come along, Raymond Ditmars. There we go. Come along. Yes. Now, there we go. Ta-ta for now. Come along, come along. Yes. Yes. That's right." Monty says fading out of view and shutting the door, before driving away.

"What did he mean, 'conundrum of esoterica'?" Sam asks Klaus.

"Well, a conundrum is a mystery. And esoterica are obscure objects or documents. Look at this." Klaus answers, walking over to Monty's desk and showing the children a blueprint. The children look at the blueprints in shock as it was a replica of Count Olaf's tattoo. "This is the original blueprint for Dr. Montgomery's landscaping. Those hedges outside make up a labyrinth. And if you look at the labyrinth from the top, it's... It looks like the tattoo Count Olaf has on his ankle. It's a mark of villainy." Klaus says.