Unfortunately Fortunate

Meeting Montgomery

If you have reached this chapter then you already know what has happened in the lives of the Baudelaire's, Quagmire's and Farmer's children. Although they were horrific chapters, I beg you again to look away and enjoy something much more happier than this book, because it is anything but that. In fact, I should warn you that their lives take a turn for the worse, because better is something in this new chapter you will not find.

"It's a new chapter of your life, children." Mr. Poe tells them smiling, while driving them down Lousy Lane, to their new guardian's place. "In a few minutes you'll be meeting your new guardian, Doctor Montgomery. He's your closest living relative and apparently should have been your guardian all along, according to your deceased parents will. I'm beginning to think it was a mistake to listen to that oddly-dressed consultant who walked into my office with no references and no identification, and who suggested that I place you in Count Olaf's care."

"We wholeheartedly agree." Violet says.

"You're a disgrace to your profession." Sunny says in baby talk, which Mr. Poe didn't understand but the rest of the children did.

"Couldn't have said it better myself, Sunny." Keira whispers to Sunny.

"My recently rehired secretary Jacquelyn is nervous that Count Olaf is still at large, but I don't think Olaf will be able to find you way out here. Oh, look, there's an easy-to-read sign for Lousy Lane." Mr. Poe says.

Elizabeth was looking out of the window the whole time. The teenager was nervous as she had a bad feeling that something horrible will happen. She could shake away her fear of Count Olaf returning, causing her to be more awake, in this case meaning ready to fight and not letting her guard down, for her safety and more importantly the other children she swore to herself she will take care of.

"By the way, the police tell me they feel very confident that Count Olaf will be caught in no time at all. Ah, here's the turn." Mr. Poe tells the children. Now, Lousy Lane is perhaps the most unpleasant lane in the world. It runs past an orchard of trees which once produced apples so sour, one only had to look at them to feel ill, and it encircles a horseradish factory, so the entire area smells bitter and strong.

Mr. Poe starts couching as Baudelaire and Quagmire children show a face of disgust while the other three aren't even bothered by the smell. "Uh, what... what is that smell?" Duncan asks.

"It's ginger, I believe. We're here." Mr. Poe tells them.

"How exactly is Dr. Montgomery related to us?" Klaus asks.

"Dr. Montgomery is, let me see, your late father's cousin's wife's brother. That probably explains why you never met him." Mr. Poe tells the Baudelaires.

"But it doesn't explain why we're being sent to live with him." Sunny says.

"This man probably can't explain what a dictionary is. I'd be surprised if he knew anything at all." Sam whispers to Sunny, making her smile. The children get out of the car and walk to the door, Violet carrying Sunny.

"Come along Violet." Mr. Poe says as they get to the front door.

"What do we call him? I mean, he's not exactly our uncle." Violet asks.

"Well, you can call him Dr. Montgomery, unless of course he asks you to call him by his first name, in which case you'll call him Montgomery." Mr. Poe says.

"His name is Montgomery Montgomery?" Klaus asks.

"Yes, yes. And I'm sure he's very sensitive about that, so please don't ridicule him. 'Ridicule' means 'tease.'" Mr. Poe tells the children.

"We know what ridicule means." Sam tells him.

"I can... I can still smell that ginger." Mr. Poe comments.