Soap x Reader: I don't do military

21. No

What do I do!? I don't have the money to go back to the USA...

I have no one here.

I left everything and everyone behind to be with him...

What about the baby?

If I tell him-

NO!

I can't tell him.

He'll think I'm guilt tripping him.

How could he...

And Gaz?

Why did he lie?

Why!?

And Johnny doesn't trust me?

A million thoughts went through my head at once.

"YN? YN?"

I looked up at Johnny.

"Are you listening? I'm going through the splitting of assets."

I stared at him and felt the tears run down my face.

Then I jumped to my feet and ran to the trash can to throw up.

I couldn't stop it.

It just kept coming and coming.

I threw up till I tasted the stomach acid.

I half hopped that Johnny would come help and comfort me.

But he didn't.

Him and his team just watched.

Once finished, I cried on my knees.

What do I do!?

"You'll keep the house and your car. You can keep everything inside the house as well. You'll get half my money and half my paychecks from here on out."

"I don't want it. I don't want any of it! I just want you!" I cried and felt so pathetic.

"That's the only thing you can't have." Johnny said and I cried harder.

I don't know how I made it to bed, I just know I cried till the sun came back up.

I got home at around 4 pm, it's now 7:30 am.

I hope I didn't let him up with my crying.

My throat felt raw and my eyes were puffy.

My face was full of buggers too.

I didn't have the energy to get up.

I just wanted to keep crying.

But I have so much to think about.

Like, what am I gonna do with the baby?

Am I ever gonna tell Johnny?

No. Whatever I do. I'll never tell him.

And if I'm going to fly home, I have to do it before I'm 7 months pregnant.

That's not a lot of time.

I have no money and no job.

I took a deep breath and sat up.

I never signed the papers. I should do that now.

Or should I drag it out?

No. I might still be deeply in love but I know I can't do anything about this.

I felt numb as I walked down the stairs.

The house was quiet.

Is Johnny even here?

The papers were still on the table where I left them

I sat down with a pen and began to read them.

Not that I was actually understanding or processing any of it. I just needed to do something to distract my mind.

I thought I was close with Gaz. Why would he lie like this?

What did I do to him?

I was staring at the wall, one hand held the stack of papers and the other held my chin up.

I heard coffee pouring into a cup.

Should I look at him?