I miss the old me
The one that was always happy
The one that always felt secure
I miss this feeling
This feeling of being loved
No matter how I am
I miss this sensation
Of having loving parents
Without changing my whole fucking self
I'm tired of lying to y'all
It becomes so much more heavy on my shoulders
To constantly have to change my whole self when I'm with you.
Y'all look so proud when I do it
When I play this role
But I can't fake it anymore .
Sometimes I look at the mirror
And I see someone else
A person completely different of who I am
A person who isn't me
Just a stranger
A stranger living in my own body
You seems so disappointed when you see me
I guess that's why y'all always compare me with others.
I know that I'm not this guy
This you always wanted to be your child
But I didn't want to be the way I am
And it really hurts me to see how disgusted you are , when you see me and how proud you are when I pretend to be this other guy.
I'm tired of being scared all the time
Tired of always hiding stuffs from you
Tired of feeling insecure
Tired of always lying
And also tired of living this fucked up double life
I wanna feel the love of my parents
Without the feeling of being judged
I wanna be close to you two
Without being insecure
I wanna tell you my secrets
But I know that I'll be rejected
I only ask you one thing
Just one thing
Just to be real parents to me.
Not people that I'm living with.
