𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙎𝙚𝙣𝙩 || 𝙆𝙚𝙣𝙣𝙮 𝙭 𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧 ||

«♱»31: Angelic

Hi, (Y/n),

If you're reading this, then I must be gone already. Right now I'm writing this because I don't know what's left of me anymore. I'm getting weaker and weaker, and so I'm writing this ahead of time because I know soon enough, I won't be strong enough to write.

For the first time in forever, I saw you again. At first, I thought I was dreaming, I couldn't help but smile at the sight of you. But then I realized it was real, you were right there in front of me. I was scared that if you were near me for too long you may be in danger so I tried to hit the emergency button to call the nurses in, but... But you took out a switchblade and held it to my throat. It wasn't even that fake flimsy one I saw you take out on Stan the day we met, it was a real switchblade. A part of me wanted to laugh because, you were still you, the weird, eccentric, and stubborn person you are... But then, I looked at your face, and you were crying. You were crying for me. You were crying because you'd finally figured it all out.

At that moment, I felt so, so, so much relief. I didn't have to fake using you or fake hating you, I could finally just be real, I could finally just be me. At that moment, I was finally free from pretending, and so I broke down in front of you, pouring every ounce of emotion I'd been holding back into my tears. And you (Y/n), my sweet girl, you held me and comforted me. You kept me safe, just as you always would. It has been so long since I've felt your touch. For the longest time, I felt like I was freezing. It was supposed to be summer, but every day was so cold and so alone to me. And then you held me, and it felt like I was being enveloped in sunlight. The warmth that radiated from you was so familiar and so comforting. Your touch was something I'd been craving for the longest time...

As I cried, and cried to you, you whispered the sweetest things to me, telling me everything was going to be okay. You told me that everything was fine now, that you wouldn't be in danger anymore. We were finally free to love each other freely. Well, as free as we could be... When you found out I'd be dying soon, I could see a part of you break, and I'm so sorry for that (Y/n).

There's nothing left for me in this body. Nothing except you, but, I could never bear to bring you with me, as you know, that's why I left you. To keep you safe. I wanted to write this letter to you, because apparently, further along this disease, there is a chance I might have difficulty talking to you. So for certain, I have to make sure you know how I feel.

W̶h̶e̶n̶ w̶e̶ f̶i̶r̶s̶t̶ m̶e̶t̶, I̶ w̶a̶s̶ s̶o̶r̶t̶ o̶f̶ j̶u̶s̶t̶ l̶i̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ m̶y̶ l̶i̶f̶e̶ d̶a̶y̶-̶t̶o̶-̶d̶a̶y̶, a̶l̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ t̶r̶y̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶o̶ a̶v̶o̶i̶d̶ d̶e̶a̶t̶h̶, b̶u̶t̶ n̶o̶ m̶a̶t̶t̶e̶r̶ h̶o̶w̶ h̶a̶r̶d̶ I̶ t̶r̶i̶e̶d̶, I̶'d̶ d̶i̶e̶ o̶v̶e̶r̶, a̶n̶d̶ o̶v̶e̶r̶. T̶h̶e̶n̶ a̶f̶t̶e̶r̶w̶a̶r̶d̶s̶ I̶'d̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ l̶i̶k̶e̶ n̶o̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ e̶v̶e̶r̶ h̶a̶p̶p̶e̶n̶e̶d̶. S̶o̶m̶e̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶ I̶ w̶a̶k̶e̶ u̶p̶ i̶n̶ a̶n̶ i̶n̶s̶t̶a̶n̶t̶, a̶n̶d̶ s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶i̶m̶e̶s̶ I̶ c̶o̶m̶e̶ b̶a̶c̶k̶ m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶s̶ l̶a̶t̶e̶r̶. B̶u̶t̶ I̶ a̶l̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ c̶o̶m̶e̶ b̶a̶c̶k̶. Before you visited me today, I thought this was it, that this was my very last time being alive. But then, I opened my eyes, and you were right there. You were so beautiful, so bright, I thought I was dreaming. As I awoke, I looked at you, and you were glowing. A bright golden haze surrounded your form, and the faint silhouette of wings appeared behind you. Above your head, I saw a shimmering gold halo. Every time I looked at you, or even dreamed of you, I quite literally saw you as an angel. My angel. You were this angel who protected me from every near-death experience I had. I adore you and love you more than any other being on this earth.

The first time I saw it was the first day I met you. You saved me from an oncoming truck coming my way.  T̶r̶u̶t̶h̶f̶u̶l̶l̶y̶, I̶ r̶e̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ w̶a̶s̶ t̶r̶y̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶o̶ g̶e̶t̶ h̶i̶t̶ b̶y̶ t̶h̶a̶t̶ t̶r̶u̶c̶k̶, I̶ w̶a̶n̶t̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ d̶i̶e̶ a̶n̶d̶ g̶e̶t̶ i̶t̶ o̶v̶e̶r̶ w̶i̶t̶h̶ b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ I̶ k̶n̶e̶w̶ t̶h̶e̶r̶e̶ w̶a̶s̶ n̶o̶ u̶s̶e̶ t̶r̶y̶i̶n̶g̶ t̶o̶ a̶v̶o̶i̶d̶ d̶e̶a̶t̶h̶. You appeared out of nowhere and knocked me to the floor, ultimately saving me from death. I remember you were so mad at me until you thought I was suicidal. Without a second thought, you pulled me into your arms and shouted,