"A lone sword" -a one-shots book

" comfortable "

the bear x reader
platonic?
+minor oc

"

You were in your old rust bucket of car, slowly fading as a patronizing pop song played on the rusted radio. It was weird, the suffocating loneliness onset from the now raging hot wound penetrating through your shoulder.

You had given up on screaming, all your movements seemed to be tethered to your pain and even when you stretched your finger out to type a 9 your veins didn't hesitate to punish you. It almost felt like the adrenaline had faded like you didn't care if you died anymore, it was like life was so much more real all of a sudden.

The uncomfortable sadness (and pain) settling on your chest sunk you into your seat creating a heated dizziness, like the types of headaches you get after crying for hours or getting clocked in the head. Only this time it had this foreboding permanence.

...

A cheery rap song rang in your ears, and for a second you wondered how much you liked rap, for the music to be playing even when you entered heaven. The comfortable heat blanketing your being + the smell of sinfully familiar chemically laced burger king order seemed to confirm your theory, opening your eyes to a pale empty apartment. Maybe this was the home promised to all those who entered heaven? The only furniture was a dedicated assortment of cookbooks, the couch you laid on and a scratched up t.v.

Maybe the eternal void wasn't as bad as you previously theorized, or maybe pretending to be Christian every Sunday had its benefits.

A deep stare penetrated your side as you lay softly tossing your head around, musing about your eternal paradise and you immediately shot up to meet it, presuming that you'd meet an angel, maybe the one who majorly fucked up last night causing the stray bullet to fracture through your car's window.

"-our up." The words didn't fully form in his lips, so they just choppily fell out. "Course you are." He mumbled to himself, but the silence of the apartment made it impossible for you not to catch it. Try as you might you couldn't help but smile, a slight giggle threatening to give away your mild joy at the reveal of your 'angel'.

"Course I am." You attempted to respond though you couldn't but help but be a bit surprised at the result of the lack of use of your voice. Your voice sounded like it had been siphoned in sand, it was made gritty and textured. "Why am I not at hospital?"

Carmen blinked at you for second, unapologetically drinking in your every alive feature. For moment you worried you'd have to repeat yourself. "Didn't have the money to keep you there another week." Carmen finally let his eyes tear away from you, though it was only to toss the still warm Burger King order in your lap.

"Another?" You pondered aloud while setting up your spread. Again you caught Carmen staring endlessly into you, abandoning the cigarette he had been nursing for a good few seconds. "Carmen, what do you mean another week?"

Once again he awkwardly blinked out of his mesmerized state to respond. "You were out for like two weeks ish. Better than the alternative I guess." You took the faintest second to pity yourself (and your wallet once those hospital bills came in)before enjoying your favorite guilty pleasure.

...

"Carmy Bear?" Carmen flinched at the nickname, almost comically. "Don't you have work?" You had been locked in Carmen's house for a few days, just trying to sort out paperwork and unpaid bills. Thankfully your eccentric girlfriend was very helpful and the two of you were nearly done with the process. But even as you were drowning in paperwork for hours Carmen stayed, his stare everpresent on you.

"I do, I'm taking a break." The words sounded foreign coming from your sickeningly overwhelmed friend and you could tell he almost didn't believe what he had said. "It's not a deal Y/N, I have extra time and you were dying." The way he talked was defensive as if he was trying to shoot down the idea of him caring for you any deeper which was probably hard to do when it was his home you were doing a mountain of paperwork in.

"Right." You rolled your eyes involuntarily at his poor excuse. Carmen awkwardly looked for a more tangible excuse before giving up and slouching on the floor next to you, patiently watching as you wrote your signature like it was the most entertaining thing he'd seen in years.

"Are you feeling okay?" After he said the words you realized that he hadn't asked that at all till today, it brought up the idea that Carmen was moving slow motion. His continuous stares, awkward delivery with words, and general unease replicated the idea pretty well.
Carmen noticed you smiling to yourself as you scribbled you initials on some painfully long medical document. "Y/N, are you good?"

You gave him your attention, which he seemed to be painfully enamored by, not that you were paying that much attention to his expression. "I'm fine, genuinely. This whole thing is pretty lukewarm to me." Carmen barely looked calmed, he was obviously worried and had been for weeks. He basically treated you like treasured pottery every time you moved and while the cautious touch was more than welcome, his aggressive fear of you getting hurt was more of an issue. "Everything that happened was an accident, so it's not like it'll happen again."

Carmen scanned you, as if trying to piece apart your lies, not even considering that you could be telling the truth. "Carmen-"

"Are you lying?" Carmen had a muddled expression, it was something between hurt and intrigue and if you would actually look at him you could figure out exactly what it was but his flooding of empathy had you emotionally tapped out.

"No Carmy, and even if I was lying to you, Lacey came by and I wouldn't lie to her." You felt that saying your girlfriend's name would somehow make him back off. Though his interest didn't seem to wane as his stare penetrated your side profile even when you did your best to ignore him. "Even if I am lying which I'm not. This whole experience would teach me to be more careful no?"

You finally gave him back your full attention, which you notice by his awkward look away he didn't expect to have again. "I hope so." Carmen's face unraveled in something of a smile, if not incredibly cautious. You couldn't help but inaudibly laugh at his attempt of being nurturing, or whatever this had been.

A smile you didn't even notice until you saw Carmen's anxious reaction to it spread on your face and you couldn't help but to get a smidge closer. Not too close of course, but just close enough so he wouldn't have an out when you held his neck and softly pushed him towards you. For a second you really thought you'd kiss him. Which would've been fine, Carmen's a great forget it ever happened kind of a guy but the first itch of pain you had gotten from your gritty scar swayed you into a cozy hug instead. Which by the way Carmen sunk into it, was needed.

"Are you okay?" You asked, now you were the awkward one as Carmen had you clenched into a hug. He hummed an affirmation as you began drawing lines into his back, it seemed like he needed this hug way more than you thought. His chewed up nails scratching into the passionate scars on your back.

It'd just be like this for a while you guessed, not that 'this' was anything bad. And it seemed to be all the two of needed so you held on to Carmen a bit tighter as he made himself more comfortable in your arms, masterfully avoiding your fresher wounds and sinking into the old ones.

...
A/N

1313 words. I haven't done an Author's Note in a while, mainly due a distaste for everything I've made. I would genuinely love to redo every single piece of writing I've made on this platform (which I am very slowly doing), but my procrastination has been passionately holding me back.
Anyway to talk about this particular story I wanted to write in the style of my first one-shot while also thinking of the inspirations for it. When it comes to romance I am extremely picky and I noticed I've been writing in tropes rather than actually exploring the subject matter which has kind of tanked the quality of everything I've written.

Basically what I'm saying is I plan on writing things that have more thought placed into and aren't rushed out because I haven't posted in 4 months.

[edited ✓]