We are just friends...

The aftermaths!

It hurts... My heart feels like it could shattering in million of pieces as I watch Bucky and Sharon begin to share their kiss, her body moves closer to his and her lips lands gracefully against his lips. It is as if the world has completely stopped moving, I quickly cover my mouth with my free hand as I quiet down my sobs. What the fuck is this... a soft tear falls down my face.

I quickly back away down from the rooftop. As I slowly re-enter the kitchen, my arms becomes heavy, dropping everything on to the floor while I gain the little strength I have to lean my hands on the kitchen counter.

He kissed her... He... He.. Oh, god I feel sick... What the hell is happening... Have I really drop down this low, to allow myself to feel like this? I agreed with him and myself that feelings wasn't to be involved and now.. I don't know what to do or feel. I look at my now pure pale hands on the kitchen as I acknowledge the amount of strenght I have been putting on them. I slowly remove them from the counter and pick up my shoes that I drop with the other stuff on the floor.

What do I do now?

"Whoa, what the fuck Sharon?" I said as I push her off me.

"What?" Sharon shook her head. "I thought... You've been flirting with me all night. You even brought me up here." She scoffs.

I strongly rub my forehead as I take a few moments to myself.

What are you doing barnes? What the fuck are you doing? Sharon is nothing to you, just some girl to make you stop thinking about y/n, about how perfect she is, how she makes everything all better, that she is the only person you can go to and... and...

"Holy shit..." I mumble to myself.

"What?"

"It was a mistake... I was stupid in thinking I could bring you up here... Here of all places..." I thrust my hands up. "I can't believe it took me this long to realise." I softly chuckle.

"Realise what?" Sharon hissed.

"That I am.." I let out a small huff of relief. "That I am crazily in love with her."

"With who?"

"With y/n." I look at her with a smile and quickly before she could say or do anything, I darted off that roof and down those stairs.

As I head down to the stairs, I quickly get into the kitchen and notice some shoes on the floor, y/n shoes. I look around for her before bended down to pick them up, maybe she passed out nearby or something.

"Y/n? You down here?" I call out and recieve complete silence. "Y/n?" Still nothing, perhaps shes in her room. I exit the kitchen area and head to the elevator to mine and y/n floor. 

I honestly can't believe how much of a dick I've been to y/n tonight, all because I let the others in my head and I fought against my feelings. Fucking asshole. I bang my head gently on the wall as I take a walk out of the elevator toward y/n room. I lift my head back up and continue walking a short while before knocking on y/n door a few times.

Again I'm greeted with slience.... I must have really pissed her off.  I try again, knocking hard on her door.

"Y/n you in here? Can you let me in? I need to talk to you." I gently shut my eyes. "I know that I've been quite a dick tonight but I just want to explain." I pull on her door handle and to my surprise, it opens up. "Doll? Are you okay?" I say as I flip the light on in her room. Her room as always tidy just enough for her. A few items of clothes on the floor and her bedding all over the place because she believes its a waste of time in making for you to just to resleep in it again. Can't say she's not wrong. I put away her shoes that I found in the kitchen, I mean it the least I could do for her after being a complete twat.