Penthesilea's Wish [Vol.1]

Chapter Forty-five

While suspended in some ethereal place between sleep and consciousness, Daniela awoke later in the middle of the night. She surprisingly began to visualize the image of the mountain lion again, which she had escaped on the riding trail several days before. She saw it vividly in her thoughts as it paused in front of her, then slipped back stealthily into the underbrush. Her thoughts then moved more pleasantly to the recent memory of what she had done in the bath earlier that evening. The independent gift to herself she knew could be relived again and again when ever she wanted or needed it. It would become like a small celebration in the future. A little ritual she could practice in solitude, and most importantly-on her own terms.

Oddly, reliving both experiences momentarily made her feel equally alive and somehow victorious. She knew that what she had accomplished for herself in courage and pleasure, she would always savor silently in the future. As Daniela left her bed, stood and walked into the bathroom, she paused in front of the mirror and removed the robe she had been sleeping in. Looking at her body newly in the dim light, she sensed some quiet transformation had taken place. It was a long time coming, she thought, and a curiosity to wonder where it would now lead her.

* * *

Penthesilea, due to her age and position in the tribe, was the first at the festival allowed to choose a former enemy warrior as a temporary mate. Ceremoniously, as had been taught all the women participating that year, she dramatically held up her hand to signal she had made her choice. Then, as the drums beat faster and the men were lined up across from the 'Daughters of the Moon,' she ran at full speed and jumped over the line of burning logs separating them to stand in front of her paramour for the night.

She stood motionlessly, dramatically making bold eye contact with him. At that moment, everyone, men and women alike, raised their hands and burst into loud cheers. The exuberance was part of the protocol, signaling Penthesilea's choice and the resolve of the women to initiate to proceedings. But it was also something else intuitively felt by both the men and the women at that poignant moment. It was the advent of a joyous truce between former enemies-ancient in its development, yet so biologically necessary for the women's survival as a unique culture.

Penthesilea's choice of mates was one expectedly young and handsome. He had the musculature of the warriors she had met only briefly in her life, but now on different terms than the familiar 'fog of war' and the panic of battle. This day of close observation and repose, had given her an opportunity she had never had before-to focus on a "man," not simply an "enemy" for his attractive and lustful attributes. The revelation was always a powerful moment for the young women in attendance at the yearly festivals.

And yet, while sobering, it initiated something else in their hearts and minds which had been strongly taught-the ephemeral nature of that attraction. It was, they understood, a rarity that would last at best only these few days. This perception, which they all accepted, caused the necessary reservation for them to never fully involve their hearts in any of the annual proceedings. Instead, they were taught to focus on the pleasure only, and the depth of their other, deeper feelings for custom and survival.

These tenets included the love for their 'Sisters', the ideals of the society, their profound independence, and even the affection and faithfulness to their horses as creatures who played such an important role in their lives. These eleven days and nights, though understood to be enjoyed to the fullest hedonistically, had a more noble purpose, and beyond it a lofty duty to sustain their shared continuation with one another for future generations.

Knowing this, and looking beyond her choice's physical strength and beauty, Penthesilea had reluctantly singled him out earlier for other curious qualities. These she felt shamelessly indulgent of, concerning the temporary nature of the event. Those secondary attributes were his sensitive face and the fact that he had smiled at her several times during his displays of skill and strength. It was a look of both respect and intimate attraction to a lethal opponent she believed-an experience she would only have but once again, near the end of her short life.