A Girl and a Whiteboard

Chapter Twelve

It was really hard saying goodbye. I woke up and went to school in my pjs because I didn't really care. They all agreed to drive me to school but they would have to drive back after that. The closer and closer we got to the school made my eyes fill with more and more tears. This is exactly why I couldn't face them and say goodbye the first time, this is what I didn't want to go through.

"We're here Emy."

'Okay.'

We had all woken up pretty early and we all said goodbye then but now it was just too real. Sydney basically sobbed into my shoulder, Addison kept babbling so she wouldn't cry, Coen kept trying to lighten the mood, and Luca just ignored us. Luca was the only one I hadn't officially said goodbye too.

I opened the door and got out. Don't look back Em. Just keep walking, one more step, keep going. You can do this just don't look back.

I couldn't take it anymore, I looked back and saw Luca running towards me. I dropped my stuff and ran to him. It wasn't one of those magical hugs they show in movies, it was so much worse than that. It was a goodbye hug, it was a forget me and go on with your life hug.

"Don't replace me Emy, please."

I just hugged him tighter. Then I heard the bell go off and I knew I had to go. I kissed him on the cheek and ran away, I picked up my stuff and walked towards government. I made sure to wipe off the tears off my face but if anybody looked close enough, you would be able to tell that I was crying.

I sat down next to Matt and Oliver and they tried to talk to me but after they saw that I wasn't going to reply, they shut up. I just needed to process saying goodbye to my best friends and then I would be better. I was going to be better.

I probably looked like a zombie or a hobo, either one. I walked towards anatomy and the same thing happened, Bash tried to talk to me but he stopped after many failed attempts. I actually didn't pay attention for once in this class.

I knew I would see them again but it wouldn't be the same. I wouldn't see them all the time, and we wouldn't hangout as much. I couldn't call Luca at three in the morning and go for a walk. It was just impossible.

I walked towards my lunch table and I put on headphones in hopes that none of the boys would try to sit with me today. I would talk to them eventually, probably tomorrow, but not today. I was really grateful for both of them, they will make this a lot easier.

I would eventually have to face Andy, I couldn't skip study hall again. Yeah depressed Emory was the worst. It's like I was there, but I wasn't. This happened sometimes. It's like I would just feel numb, I wasn't happy or sad, I just felt empty. It happened a lot before I came here. This place has helped me, but bringing up my past, just brought back the memories of what happened.

It was time for study hall, I guess if I just sat there and pretended to look busy then Andy wouldn't make me talk to him. I got there before him. I sat down and pulled out my binder and made it look like I was diligently studying. Apparently, I wasn't that good of an actress, so taking drama one didn't pay off overall.

"Em, please talk to me."

No response.

"I know you can hear me."

Damn.

'What?'

"Are you okay?"

'I'm perfect.'

"Emory, I'm being serious."

'I know.'

"I just want to help.'