Also known as walking depression or high-functioning depression, smiling depression may actually be a condition known as major depressive disorder with atypical symptoms, formerly known as atypical depression. While the symptoms are essentially the same as those of major depression, what makes them "atypical" is that they are experienced internally and not expressed in any visible way. Another element, that is often perceived as confusing, is that the depressed people can experience a lift in mood in response to positive events, enhancing the façade that they are "doing fine".
It is rather common for people to keep their depression private, They often mask their sadness with a smile and an external façade, which are designed to hide their inner turmoil and suffering.
People with smiling depression often have a strong support system and resources, yet they are unable to open up about their struggles. This is particularly true if they belong to a culture that tends to stigmatize mental health issues, or are part of a family that puts high value on using willpower and self-reliance to get through hard times, rather than talking about it or asking for help. In these cases, the people may feel that struggling emotionally is a sign of weakness or a lack of personal character.
If a person has shared their feelings in the past and be told to "snap out of it" or "try harder", it will be harder for them to bring it up again.
People who are more likely to have smiling depression are often perfectionists, afraid of failure and more easily embarrassed and humiliated. They have high expectations of themselves and do not want to disappoint other's expectations, or change the image others have of them as a successful, positive person. They believe, that they just need to be "stronger" and "better" in order to get through it. Depressed people may feel guilty about suffering and "complaining" when their life is "fine" and other people have it "so much worse". They might be in denial about their mental illness.
The suicide risk is higher due to the people being high-functioning. People with smiling depression often have enough energy to follow through on their suicidal thoughts.
What smiling depression may look like
• An active, high functioning individual
• Someone holding down a steady job, with a healthy family and social life
• A person appearing to be cheerful, optimistic and generally happy
What smiling depression may feel like
• Like showing signs of depression would be a sign of weakness
• Like they would burden anyone by expressing their true feelings
• That they do not have depression at all, because they are "fine"
• That others have it worse, so they do not have the right to complain
• That the world would be better off without them
Symptoms of smiling depression
• Overwhelming sadness and hopelessness
• Lack of self-confidence and self-worth
• Anxiety
• Mood swings
• Difficulty concentrating and making decisions
• Suicidal thoughts
• Not taking pleasure from activities they used to enjoy, despite pretending to
• Substance abuse
• Sleeping too much or too little, including long naps during the day
• Significant changes in appetite or weight
• Feeling of heaviness in the arms and legs
• Headaches or body aches
• Irritability and restlessness
• Extreme reactions to what they perceive as criticism or rejection
Fear of burdening other: Depression and guilt and tend to go hand-in-hand. Consequently, many people do not want to burden others with their struggles. This fact may be especially true for people who are used to taking care of others rather than having others take care of them. They simply do not know how to ask for help, so they keep their struggles to themselves.
Denial: Smiling depression may stem from a person's denial that they feel depressed. They may think that as long as they are smiling, they must not have depression. Many people can not admit that there might be something wrong with them. It is easier for them to pretend like they are fine, then it is to open up about how they truly feel.
Embarrassment: Some people believe depression is a character flaw or a sign of weakness. They may even believe the lie that they should be able to "snap out of it". When they can not, they think there is something wrong with them. Consequently, they may feel embarrassed about having depression, because they think they should be able to handle it themselves.
Fear of backlash: Sometimes people worry about the personal and professional ramifications of having depression. For example, a comedian or lawyer may be concerned that their employer will doubt their ability to do their job. Or, someone may worry that a partner will leave them, if they reveal that they have depression. So, rather than being judged pr punished for being depressed, they hide behind a smile.
Concern about appearing weak: People with Smiling Depression often fear that others will take advantage of them if they reveal that they have depression. Not only do they worry that others will see them as weak and vulnerable, but they are concerned that other will use their depression as leverage against them. They would rather put on a though exterior than admit that they need help.
Guilt: Because guilt tends to accompany depression, sometimes people do not feel as though they should be depressed. They may think they have a good life and should not feel bad. They also feel like they must be doing something wrong or that they are somehow to blame for being depressed. Consequently, they feel guilty and sometimes even ashamed of their depression. So they keep it hidden behind a smile.
Perfectionism: Perfectionists have often mastered the art of looking perfect. And, for many, that means disguising any pain or problems that they are experiencing. As a result, admitting to depression would mean that their lives are less perfect and they just can not bring themselves to do that.
Unrealistic views of happiness: Social media portrays happiness in an unrealistic way. Many people scroll through social media and see pictures of happy people. Consequently, they grow to believe that they are the only ones struggling with mental health issues. They may feel more isolated than ever and it could cause them to hide their struggles.
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