HOW FAR CAN A PIÑATA RUN INTO THE DESERT?

4. FOR ILLUSTRATIVE PURPOSES ONLY. ACTUAL RESULTS MAY VARY.

I.

You're sitting in a rickshaw outside Bruffendale Tower with Mr. E sitting next to you. It's late at night and the lobby of Bruffendale Tower is brightly-lit, as are the windows on most of the floors, but not much else is happening on 21st Street.

"Here I go," you say.

"Remember, get in and get out," Mr. E says. "Take this." He hands you a walkie-talkie.

"A walkie talkie? Seriously?" you ask. You suddenly feel like you're in some sort of spy movie.

"In case you run into trouble. Remember the Persian has eyes all over this building."

"Alright," you reply. "Wait, so that means you just carry around a pair of walkie-talkies with you at all times?"

"Not all the time. Do you have any change?"

"Not right now," you say, a little confused. "Why?"

Mr. E gives you a coin. "There's a secret elevator in this building. Use it if you run into trouble. You'll need the coin to make it work."

You jump off the rickshaw and go across the silent, steamy night-time street and into the building through the revolving door. There's a security guard sitting behind the reception desk. You cross the deserted lobby to the turnstiles, trying to act normal. You scan your access pass and go to the elevators. You see one of the elevators, the one that was destroyed, has been covered with some sort of tape — like what they put around crime scenes. You get into a different, still-functioning elevator and press 52, but just as the elevator doors close, you see the security guard peering over at you, picking up the phone and sending out a message in a low voice.

You hear a crackle on the walkie-talkie. "Come in," says Mr. E's radio-static voice.

"Coming in," you respond. "I'm in the elevator heading up. I saw the security guard making a call just as I came in."

"You'd better hurry, then," says Mr. E. "The cavalry are on the way."

The elevator arrives at the 52nd floor and you get out. It's silent and not as well-lit as usual, with only half of the lights turned on. The only sign of movement is a janitor vacuuming the floor wearing big headphones a little ways down the hallway. He hasn't seen you, but you quietly sneak past him and head towards Room 528. There's more of that crime scene tape all over the entrance. There's also a note pinned to the door. You take it and unfold the paper. The message reads:

THIS ROOM IS NO LONGER ACCESSIBLE. DO NOT ENTER. ALSO, DIDN'T YOU KNOW YOU HAVE TO FINISH YOUR MILK BEFORE THE EXPIRY DATE?

You tear down the tape with your good hand that's not in a sling and open the door. "I'm in," you tell Mr. E on the walkie-talkie, as you step into the room and pick up your pillow from the milk-stained floor. "How are we looking?" you ask, looking around the room, searching for the magazine.

"No sign of trouble yet," Mr. E confirms. "Are you done?"

You're still looking around the room, trying to ignore the expired milk on the walls. "I can't find it," you say.

"Find what?"

"My magazine," you reply. "It's gone." You look all around the room, but it's nowhere to be found. "They've taken it."

"Listen, you're going to have to forget about it. We've got company. A black town car just pulled up outside. I think it was a trap. They wanted you to come back to Room 528 so they could have you cornered. You need to get out of there. Now."

You rush out of the door and begin running, clutching your pillow with your good arm. You approach the elevators, but just as you get there, you see the doors slide open and two agents wearing dark suits step out of it. Why do agents always wear suits? You don't know. You duck and hide behind a corner before they can see you. They head off in the direction of Room 528, and you head in the opposite direction away from them.