Stardew Valley |This Modern Love | F!Female Farmer x Sebastian

Helicopter

Sebastian's fingers pause over the keyboard as his phone buzzes. Without thinking, he grabs it.

Sage: All right, try Illinois by Sufjan Stevens. Chicago is my favorite. Makes me feel like packing up and skipping town.

He squints. Isn't that what she already did?

Sage: Oh wait. I guess I did that already. Must be my theme song.

He laughs, full-bellied and loud. And it makes him wonder, when was the last time he laughed this hard? Sebastian tries not to dwell on it. Scrolling through their messages, his eyes fall on the photo of the bag and spider. He types its description into Google and scrolls through photos. Looks similar to Agelenopsis - common and completely safe.

Sebastian: Cool, I'll give it a listen. I'll call you some time to get those tools. And don't worry about the spider. I looked it up, it's probably harmless. :P

Sebastian opens Limewire and downloads Illinois. He clicks on Chicago. The music is jubilant, an instant explosion of multiple instruments with soaring melodies. Contemplative, determined, yet somehow soft. A little chaotic, he thinks, but it works.

I was in love with the place/In my mind, in my mind/I made a lot of mistakes/In my mind, in my mind

He stops typing and thinks the lyrics are starting to feel a little personal. Sebastian wonders if Sage is calling him out. But no, that's silly. She doesn't even know him well enough to do that...right? In love with the place in my mind...he wonders if that's what Zuzu is to him.

If I was crying, in the van, with my friend/it was for freedom/from myself and from the land

Sebastian's hand darts to the mute button. The lyrics are too relatable. He feels vulnerable, dragged out of his comfort zone. What am I even doing? Abby and I ended things and I'm already flirting with a girl I just met.

Memories of the afternoon float through his mind. The bitter warmth of the coffee, and how it burnt his throat. How Sage planted potatoes like it was something she'd done all her life, because she figured she'd try it. How domestic it felt, to read and sip coffee on the porch while she worked.

In a way, he both admires and envies her. He's been saying he'd move back to the city for years, but he's still here, in his basement. An outcast from his own family. Yet she, a city dweller, waltzed into town and decided she'd be a farmer on a fucking whim.

Where did she get the confidence to do that? He threads his fingers through his hair and curses. This is fucking dangerous. He tosses his phone across the room. It hits his blanket with a whump.

If he's going to ever move to the city, he needs to get his mind off of Sage. Needs to stop texting her so much, needs to stop seeing her, at least for a while. The thought's met with a pang from his heart and it only serves to harden his resolve. Falling for her isn't going to get him where he wants to be.

Right?

He exhales, a long, heavy, sigh, and clicks over to his email. There's a dozen messages from clients, all with dozens of bugs needing fixed. Rubbing his head, he swears.

Time to put his nose to the grindstone. Gotta save up enough to move to the city. The thought's a dissonant note inside him, and his jaw clenches. Sebastian cracks his knuckles and starts tackling the list of problems. A perfect distraction from his inner turmoil.

His bedroom is his home for the foreseeable future. He leaves only to eat, shower, and use the bathroom. Allows himself a smoke by the lake for an occasional treat. Sebastian tries to resist the urge to text Sage, and sets a limit of one or two per day.