If only I knew

Chapter Forty-three

They found me at last. I don't know how but they did. They found out where my day job is, and where I stay. One morning when I went to office I was shocked to see a large group of people gathered outside my office building. My company only occupied one unit out of the so many units housed in this building so it was great convenience to everybody else. So I asked for permission to work from home thereafter, which was sad and depressing because it means I couldn't see Sammi and Eva anymore. Then they found out where I stay too. We don't have a security post but we do need an access code to access the building and some people managed to sneak past and get to my door and hoard outside until Jia Zheng shooed them away. I became confined to my apartment literally, like lockdown covid period. 

Luckily, there's Jia Zheng, who made sure I have food to eat, and that I'm safe and healthy, and kept me sane because I was living a hermit life. 

The company managed to contain more information being leaked. Apparently they managed to lock the data cloud or something. But they haven't been much pleased. They were very upset with JC and it's said that the current shooting was delayed, as well as the previous drama to-be-aired, some publicity thing. I hope they are not 'freezing' him, that would be disastrous. All these stupid people - aren't they so-called fans - so why are they ruining their idol - don't they know that they are ruining him - if you are really a fan and care for your idol, won't you want your idol to be happy? You seriously think you can so-called 'keep' him to yourself? Jeez.. what stupidity. 

When I talked to him on the phone, which is really not so often these days, like maybe once in a few days, he always assures me that everything is fine. But I know it is not. He is not fine. We are not fine. If at least our relationship is strong and steady, I think I will be able to bear all these, or maybe he too. But it must be very tough on him. Finally I couldn't take it anymore and asked him. 

"Do you feel that we are drifting apart?" I asked him. 

"Huh - what do you mean?" 

"You've stopped texting and calling regularly."

"I'm busy -"

"Yes but in the past you still always managed to squeeze in a text or two no matter how busy you were," I reminded him. 

"This time this drama is more challenging and tougher - I'm really tied up in shooting." 

"You stopped telling me things too."

"What do you mean? I still tell you everything." 

"No you don't - you didn't tell me about your new song, you didn't tell me about you and Zhou Ye," he explained to me that Zhou Ye indeed had a crush on him and confessed to him but he had very gently rejected her. 

"Are you still upset about those? I thought I've explained to you -"

"Yes.. but..." 

"I'm really busy - and tired - these are just minute stuff -"

Minute stuff? In the past he gets so worried that I get the wrong idea, or that I'm left alone, or that I'm reading too much gossips - now he says it's minute stuff? 

"I see... I'm sorry to bother you then..." I said. 

"Let's not argue about this.." he said, in a tired voice. "Did you had your dinner?" 

"Yes. Jia Zheng is on morning shift this week so he's been cooking dinner for me." 

"I see.." 

"Lucky there's him, otherwise I'm really stuck at home..." I chuckled. 

"That's nice of him." 

"He's a nice guy." 

"I got to go."