Trapped forever: The never-ending captivity of a lost girl.

chapter 14

I arrive at my tent my body trembles my skin hot as fire I sit down. "why do I do this why do I push everyone away " I whisper out he's never gonna forgive me.
*pans pov* I arrive at my spot in the tree I sit down looking at the view of neverland I was gonna get the girl but I had to push the limits too far I put all this pressure on her she's never gonna forgive me. I never felt this way before specifically about a girl my heart races just thinking about her she makes my problems go away when im in her presence she makes me forget about my past my problems my anger she makes me feel soft and warm I wanna stay with her forever but she's clearly not gonna forgive me now. why do I always mess things up i wipe my eyes confused as my finger feels wet. am I crying?
the things I feel for divine she is really the one
I have to get her back I have to fix this I cant let her stay mad at me I cant let her find out there's a way to leave neverland I can't lose the girl. I love
I jump down from the tree and run to the Divine tent I don't even knock I burst into seeing Divine sitting on her bed "Divine?" I say in a low tone she lifts her head up her forehead sweaty her cheeks red as a cherry her eyes tired looking like she's given up on everything she shakes her hair in a mess what have I done? I look at her like a lost cause she's lost just like me "Divine... I-"I walk towards her sniffling I bend down she looks down avoiding my gaze "i. am just so sorry for all this I shouldn't have pressured u I shouldn't have hurt u multiple times I shouldn't have sent my shadows to get you i- I just wanted to make your life worth living you know you were struggling so much I felt awful not doing it sooner I'm so sorry divine you have to forgive me I just can't lose you divine I never felt this way for anyone I love you so much divine I don't want to lose you you never ever I feel so safe and comfortable around you you make me forget about all my past and problems I wanna stay by your side forever I never wanna leave your side." I let out a sad sigh I looked up she still avoided me "Divine I- please look at me" I stuttered I heard her quiet sniffles she then finally spoke. "Pan I-" "I don't think I'm mentally okay to be in a relationship right now. I appreciate what u said but-" "Divine I can help you whenever u need me I'm always gonna be here for you I'm always gonna protect you please divine give me a chance please." I then start to beg she lifts her head and looks at my pleading eyes she blinks slowly she sniffles "Please" my voice cracks she gulps "I- do you really think you can handle me? I'm A lot to deal with I've been told that my whole life." she slowly says "Yes I promise divine" I say reaching for her hand she puts her hand in my mind she places her head on my shoulder still sniffling "I'm sorry your hurting. Baby" I hesitate that last word as she doesn't like pet names "Sorry," I say Immediately apologizing "It's okay I guess they're fine I just need to put up with it" "Please tell me when it gets too much." I express "okay. Love" she speaks up "Did u.. Say a pet name?" I get a little shocked "Yeah- I guess I did" I look towards her beautiful face and see a little smile creeping upon her "Is that a smile I see I love your smile" I state "Thank you. Pan" she declared I removed my hand from her grasp and wrapped my left arm around her rubbing my thumb around her soft rosy skin she sighed "I'm sorry too. For shouting and stuff I'm not usually like I just- " "It's okay darling never apologize it's not your fault" She smiles and yawns just after "You should probably sleep now not pressuring you or anything but if u ever wanna sleep in my bed it's really comfy just ask" I give her a warm smile as I walk out I stop as I hear her soft voice "wait- could I sleep in your bed?" she asks "of course my love" she creeps towards me we exit the tent and we make our way to mine I creep the door open and I let her in first "il wait outside for u to change" I inform her "no- it's okay just turn around of course oh wait I forgot my PJs" she speaks out "no that's okay Il get u new ones" a pair of bottoms and top appear in my arms the top was purple and the bottoms were purple leopard print assuming that's what she likes "oh wow thank you there nice" she tells me as I turn around she changes she lets me know she's done and we hop into bed "your right your bed is much comfier" she giggles I smile at her laugh so cute I turn my light off as I whisper night love to her we both fall into deep sleep. I'm so glad I went to her I love her to bits. Until..