Chapter 8
The Missionaries
“So what’d you think of the church?” Bobby asked me as I punched in for work.
“It was different,” I answered, trying to leave the shock out of my voice.
“Yeah, a lot of first timers have that reaction. But once you’re converted it seems the norm, and all the other churches are just a bore.”
“I don’t know. I think I’d rather have the ‘bore’ label. It was all a little too weird for me,” I said.
“Like what was weird?” Bobby asked, as he punched in his time card. We both started for the front of the store.
“That whole speaking in tongues business. It really freaked me out. I thought that you guys were all nuts.”
“Pixie did too. But I told her it rarely got this out of hand. Baptisms are a special thing.”
“Yeah, I was going to ask you about Pixie being there. I thought she was married.”
“She is, but her husband ran off with some other woman so technically they’re separated till the divorce goes through.”
“I see…”
“How about you and Yvonne? What’s going on there?”
“I don’t know really. She told me to call her, so I did. But all I got was that answering machine telling me to drop by her house on Saturday.”
“Ah! I bet she’s having the missionaries talk to you.”
“Missionaries?” I asked; suddenly feeling cornered.
“Yeah. All of us men have to go on a mission to wherever the church sends us. I went to Argentina. Some are sent here. The whole program is the reason why the church grows so fast.”
“ I see. And I thought it was the Cardinal Tommy TV show!” I said, chuckling.
Saturday came quick. I saw Yvonne with muscle boy on Wednesday and Friday. He stared hard at me and I stared back smartly and Yvonne just smiled enjoying it all. Missy got fired from the deli for tasting the soup with her fingers, then got a job at a baby store that Mick drove her to, for I was studying for a test. After two days she still had the job.
“ I can’t believe they hired her,” Mick said, as we were taking turns shooting at a basketball hoop early that morning. “They must be desperate!”
“Maybe her childlike qualities make her perfect for working at a baby store,” I offered.
“Childlike what? I see a lot of kids that act brighter than she does.”
“True, and have you noticed that she farts an awful lot?”
He almost laughed then said, “No, that I did not notice.”
He took a shot from the backcourt, hitting the basket, taking all net. “She’s different, but I didn’t notice her farting.”
I had never been around a sewer before, but I had visited my Uncle in Westernport Maryland, where there is a paper mill that produces a rather strong odor. It’s bothersome to the uninitiated, but to those who work there and live around it, like my Uncle, it is the pleasant fragrance of money. Unfortunately, I do not think the same could be said of Missy’s flatulence.
It was of this and other thoughts like these that tossed back and forth within my head as I drove to Yvonne’s house, having left Mick still shooting baskets at the park.
YOU ARE READING
Childlike
SpiritualJoshua Nun starts his first year in college with hopes of adventure, education and finding a girlfriend. Much to his surprise he meets not one but three ladies, all who want to help him find God. Joshua, with help from his friends, manages to travel...
