Childlike

Chapter 16 Windup Fish and the Evil Joshua Nun

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Chapter 16

Windup Fish and the Evil Joshua Nun

            I awoke as I usually did with my mom reaching into my bedroom and flicking on the wall switch that turned on a large fluorescent ceiling light. It was an old styled switch that made a loud click when toggled, which usually did the job of waking me combined with the firing up of the old fluorescent tubes that ensured that I wouldn’t fall back to sleep. I rolled over and as usual my bedside clock read 6:00 o’clock. I had almost gotten four hours of sleep.

One of my chores in the house was to vacuum all the carpets each morning at 6:00 A.M.. My mom didn’t care what time I came home at night as long as I still got up and vacuumed. I got the vacuum cleaner from the hall closet and went out to the family room and began vacuuming. I was halfway through when I remembered Missy. I quickly turned off the vacuum in time to hear my mom say “Well that is not what we do in this house Missy!”  Abandoning my vacuum I tentatively made my way to the livingroom.

“Sorry,” Missy said. My mom didn’t say anything but stood there, arms crossed, and staring.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Let her tell you,” my mom said, then marched out of the room, heavy footsteps echoing through the house. Missy looked at me innocently.

“So,” I began.

“I heard you vacuuming so I stuck my gum on the carpet.”

“Your gum?”

“Yeah and your mom got mad.”

“I bet! Haven’t your ever heard of a garbage can? Why put it on the carpet?”

“That’s what I’ve always done. If my mom was vacuuming I’d stick my gum to the carpet and she’d suck it up.”

I shook my head amazed. “Well we don’t do that in our house.”

“I know now. I said I was sorry.”

“I’ve got to finish my vacuuming. Why don’t you just sit here till I’m finished,” I told her.

“Sure, I’ve got my morning prayers any way.”

I went back to the family room and finished it, then turned off the vacuum in time to hear Missy saying, “What a religious picture!”

“Religious? It’s a tree. What’s religious about a tree?” My sister Annie yelled.

“I don’t know. It just looks religious.”

“Josh!” Annie called out as she came stomping through the kitchen to the family room. “Your girlfriend in there is a certified loony!”  She whispered, then threw herself into a kitchen table chair picking up the morning paper. “Where do you find these nuts?” I ignored her and went out to the dining room where I found Missy staring at the wall mural of a tree by a lake.

“Isn’t that the most religious picture you’ve ever seen?” She said.

“I’ve got to vacuum,” I answered her, for it looked just like a tree to me.

I finished my morning chore and went out to join my sisters and Missy at the breakfast table. My sisters were eating a bowl of cereal and Missy was talking with my mom. “You don’t want cereal, then what would you like?” My mom asked her.

“Oatmeal,” she answered her. “I’d really like some oatmeal.”

“Okay, I’ll make you some oatmeal.”

“I’ll have some oatmeal too,” I said.

“Alright then, so will I.” My mom said as she went over to the stove.