MEGAN

Chapter 16

Niklas

"Nik?" Nate said as he opened the door of his apartment to find his friend standing on the other side in just his pants, naked and barefoot.

"Did something happen?" he asked, feeling worried at the sorry sight the man made. If Nate knew anything about Nik, it was that the man was always prepared. He never left his house without at least one weapon and a necessity bag in case something happened, let alone without his clothes on.

"Could I stay here tonight? I know that it's late, but I didn't know where else to go." Nik whispered, looking anywhere but at his friend.

His hands were still shaking, and his head was a right mess, so much so that in his haste to just leave, he had forgotten to take his wallet, although even if he had remembered that, he seriously doubted any hotel would accept him in the state of undress, he was in. Nothing said 'lunatic' as much as going around in mid-March in just your underwear.

"Of course. Come in, come in." Nate said, ushering him inside quickly and closing the door behind him.

"Thanks," Nik said, his voice still so quiet that Nate had to strain himself to hear him.

He led him into the living room, glancing at the man every few seconds, befuddled at what could have happened to make him act so out of character.

"Make yourself at home. I'll just go and find you something to wear," he said as they entered the living room before making his way to his room.

Nik nodded before sitting on the couch, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. He couldn't stop thinking about what had happened, the memory of Megan's wide eyes staring at him as she held her bruised throat flashing constantly through his mind.

He had hurt her. Fuck, Nik had almost killed her, and just the thought of it made him feel sick to his stomach.

He leaped to his feet, running towards the bathroom, and just in time, in the next moment, he found himself clutching the toilet bowl as he expelled the entire contents of his stomach.

"Fuck." he mumbled, sitting up and leaning against the tub next to the toilet.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he cursed as he started to slap himself over and over again, not even feeling the pain. He felt so angry, so ashamed. He wanted to hurt himself as much as he had hurt Megan.

"Nik!" he heard Nate exclaim as the man entered the bathroom, but he was too lost in his world of self-hatred and despair to answer.

He lay down on the cold tiles, curling into a fetal position as he started to cry. He couldn't even remember when was the last time he did that; after Tamara had died, maybe, and he felt ashamed to be doing it in Nate's presence. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't stop; the tears kept coming every time he thought of Megan.

"Come on, big guy, let's get you to bed," Nate said as he grabbed Nik's arm and pulled him up. Nik complied, letting Nate guide him to his guest room and put him in bed, uncaring even when he saw Nura standing at the doorway and watching him worriedly.

"Get some sleep, buddy. Everything will be alright." Nate said as he tucked him in before leaving the room with his girlfriend in tow.

Nik stared at the opposite wall, Nate's words going through his mind.

All right; nothing will ever be all right again.

∞

It took a long time, but Nik eventually fell into a restless sleep, his dreams filled with nightmares of Megan, motionless and pale, staring at him vacantly.