Blue Kisses

Chapter 7

I haven't left my bed yet today, why would I? I don't have school, I'm caught up on my homework, so why should I leave my warm soft bed. And to do what anyways? Here, I can think about Alice. I can be in my head and imagine what would happen if I did the play, if I kissed Alice? What would her lips feel like pressed against mine? Would she have gotten butterflies and realize she's been in love with me all along? Only her in my bed and in my mind is where I get to kiss her, why would I leave? I turn over in my sheets and I see her face, she kisses me and today I decided I'm lovesick, and I will not get out of bed no matter what. Well maybe I can get out of bed so I can grab my headphones and listen to love songs while I picture me and Alice together. I know Joshua and Alice probably have a crush on each other, but today they don't, not in my bed and not in my head.

My body is being shaken, I lift my head out from my covers and I can barely see her in the dark but Lucy is here shaking me. I look at her with annoyance. She's talking to me so I take out my headphones and the music is blasting so I turn it off. "What are you doing in bed? It's 3pm? And why are you listening to old Taylor Swift songs?" Lucy asks. She opens my curtain and the light burns my eyes so I pull my covers over my face. "Why do you look like you're rotting? I've never seen you like this." she claims.

"I'm sick," I cry.

Lucy comes into my bed and sits against my headboard. "You don't look sick," she puts her hand against my forehead. I sit up next to her. She looks at my nightstand and grabs the drawing that Alice drew of me and her at the beach. She looks at it and chuckles. "You and Alice are becoming really close huh?" she asks me.

"Yeah, we have every class together and take the same bus." I reply, Lucy is still looking at the drawing, "Don't worry she'll never replace you." I add.

"I'm not worried about that." she says.

"What are you worried about then?" I ask.

Lucy puts the drawing back on my nightstand and then looks at me in my eyes, "Josie, do you like Alice?"

"Yes of course," I start melting into my bed and pulling the covers over me. What is she getting at?

"I mean, do you have a crush on Alice?" Lucy asks, pulling the covers off of me.

Why can't she ignore me and leave, I can't answer that. I can't lie to her either. So I'll say nothing.

"Josie," she leans over my body and calls like I'm a dog.

"What?" I say looking back at her

She sighs, "Do you have romantic feelings for Alice?"

"Maybe," I reply. Lucy's face is aggravated, she's staring at me waiting for me to say more. "Okay fine, yes I do."

"Why didn't you tell me? You know you can tell me anything." Lucy says.

"I don't know, I didn't want to admit to myself that I had a crush on her. And when I finally did everyone became friends and I didn't want to make things awkward." I reply

"Yeah, I understand that." Lucy replies and looks down.

"Are you mad at me?"

"No or course not, I love you," she says.

"I love you too."

Lucy lays down with me, "When did you realize you had a crush on her?" She asks, resting her head on my pillow.

"Well, I became obsessed with her. She was all I could think about. She's still all I can think about. I didn't understand what I was feeling, at first I thought I admired her and wanted to be like her, y ou know? She's nice to everyone and happy all the time. She's cool, mysterious, and funny. She has the biggest brown eyes, when I look into them I lose track of time and look into them forever. She has the cutest laugh. She's small and adorable. The way she see's life is so beautiful, everything excites her. But then I realized I wanted to be with her, every second of every day. I don't know what to do."

Lucy pulls out her phone, "Can you repeat all of that?" she says putting her phone to my face. "I think if I record that and send it to her she'll fall in love with you instantly."

I push her phone out of my face, "You can't, that's evil!"

Lucy pats my head "poor girl, you are so in love."

"Ugh," I dig my head into Lucy's shoulder.

"You know Joshua likes her too, right?" She says concerningly.

I let out a sigh, "I know. And I know she likes him back." I look up at her face, "What do I do?" I can feel my face drooping as I ask her.

"You could try telling her how you feel?" Lucy suggests.

"Yeah. Maybe," I laugh. I can't do that, what are the chances of Alice liking me back? And what are the chances of us working out, most romantic relationships don't last. Just look at my parents, they're always fighting and cheating on each other. "I think it's best if me and Alice stay friends. It's the only way I can have her in my life forever." I'll have to figure out how to get over her first but I'm better off alone, maybe love is not meant for me.

Lucy sighs and we both sit there in our thoughts. Did I make her upset? "Have you eaten today?" She asks me. I look at her with a guilty face. "Come on, let's get you some food."