The First De-Quandran

I Get Jumpscared By A Snack Bag Of Peanuts

A ding wakes me up and I groan, wishing I could just sleep the rest of my life. I try to fall back asleep but my brain nags me to look out the window instead.

I immediately almost wet myself.

First of all, we're up above the clouds and it's breathtaking. The various vivid shades of white and grey and blue burn my retinas but I can't stop looking. On the ground, cloud gazing was interesting at best but up here they're so gorgeous I wish I had a phone to take pictures of it with. They're fluffier up here and wispy, slowly drifting into nothingness.

Second of all, the ground is visible but it is very, very far down. Planes never looked as high up when I saw them but I was sorely mistaken. The roads and cities look like squares and oddly enough it takes away from the beauty. It's such neatness, but neatness doesn't really feel like how humanity should be expressing itself. It seems like we're going slowly when I look down there, but I can feel that's not the case as giant accumulations of white perfection zip under and around us. I look higher and nearly blind myself by looking directly at the sun. It's just sitting above the clouds and when I look down again I can see areas where it's cloudy and areas where the sun is peaking out. I mark this down as one of the coolest things I've ever seen.

Third of all, there are pegasi pumping their legs to gallop as they fly dangerously close to the plane. One is pure black, the other is spotted with white and shining bronze. I swear to the stars one looks at me and whinnies, tossing its head from side to side to make its mane wilder. The other one flicks its tail and I wonder what they're saying. I've heard rumors Percy Jackson can speak to horses since Poseidon made them from sea foam. I'm not sure Venus has anything to do with that but they are beautiful and I stare openly.

"Excuse me, Sir?"

A gentle voice startles me for the hundredth time today and I look over to see a woman smiling at me in a uniform. Are there people that work on planes besides the pilots? "Uh, hi. Sorry, I just woke up and I'm a little jumpy."

She smiled graciously. "Would you like a beverage or a snack?"

"I don't have any money." I would like a snack, I'm huge and starving to the maximum degree at all times.

"They're free," She assures. "I've got a snack mix, pretzels, peanuts, and small bags of chips as well as almost any soda or juice you can think of."

"Do you have apple juice?" I ask nervously. What if this is a trap? I cannot begin to describe how I would never recover if by some miracle from the gods I managed to survive a monster attack right now. The second the plane landed I'd bury myself alive and die of suffocation with a big fat smile.

The attendant digs two out and hands them to me. "And a pack of peanuts, please."

When she hands it over the plane drops suddenly and passengers cry out in fear. The seatbelt sign dings but I already have mine on. That doesn't matter to me though, I crank it as tight as it can go and pray to the gods to spare me.

"Attention passengers of Jupiter Airlines, it seems we're having a bit of uncharted turbulence. Please stay in your seats, we are beginning our initial departure into North Dakota."

I can feel us descending, my ears start to pop a little so I yawn probably intentionally. The peanuts are still there, so I pick them up and open them to shove more than a few into my mouth. I go through the first bag in five seconds. They're barely salted and honestly pretty gross, but I'll take it with an open mouth and rumbling stomach.

I turn the next one over to look at the packaging and yelp in alarm, dropping the bag and trying to scramble up but I'm stuck.

The dream from the night before the prophecy fills my mind again and I feel a sting of panic. That face I saw on the bag was the face of the woman on the beach. I could've sworn I heard her whisper to me, "I'm coming for you, Steven De Mayo," in that gravelly voice that makes me want to pour bleach in my ears.

Panting, I look around to see if anyone else has a problem with their peanuts and of course they don't. I'm just losing my mind probably.

I settle back into my seat and try to nap off the rest of the trip but I can't help but look out to see if there are more pegasi. Somehow it made me feel better, but if it makes me feel better I can safely guess it will never happen again. They aren't there but I can imagine them being majestic and cool, which does make me feel an iota better.

I realize with a start that we're nearing the ground faster now, buildings and houses are clearer. I can see pools, but what I mostly see is grass.

Lots of grass. Brown grass, green grass, golden grass, prairie grass. Just basically a lot of that. I like grass well enough though, and I'm curious what the people around here do for fun if it's not farming or talking about farming.

Walking out of the plane is like being in the middle of a bar fight, so I just wait until I'm the last one. The landing was so perfect I didn't even feel it, so I make it a point to thank the pilot, who smiles big at me.

It makes me feel so good I almost don't notice the smell of... "Ugh, is that poop?"

Someone next to me chuckles. "Yep. Welcome to Fargo."

This can't be right. This airport is so little it couldn't even count as a mall. It's absolutely pathetic compared to the Newark airport, and I feel like I'm bumping into people every two feet. Then once it calms down, it seems too big even to fit the 20 people in here.

In front me, a group of teenagers are chatting idly wearing purple shirts. Anxiety crawls up my spine as I think about how gross and sweaty I am. Probably best if I just speed past.

I think they notice how fast I'm moving, namely because I slip on the bottom stair and fall flat on my ass. "Stars, why me?" I groan quietly as I shake it off and practically sprint out of the door.

Big mistake.

The smell is worse, it's stronger out here but my skin tingles even though I'm in the shade. Underneath the stench, it smells like nighttime. I don't know how to describe it, you probably know what I mean. A parking lot is about 20 feet in front of me and I can see the end of it possibly 200 feet away. This town must be small, there weren't a lot of people on my flight either now that I think about it.

I'm standing completely alone for two seconds before I feel tears coming on. I have no guidance, I have no clue what I'm doing here and absolutely no inkling of what to do next.

"You look like a lost puppy."

I whip to the right and find a guy in all black staring into the distance smoking a vape. I know they're bad for you but he looks so cool doing it I can't help but wonder if I need nicotine too cause I'm stressed to Tartarus and back. "I'm... new in town?"

He doesn't bother to look at me but he does smirk. Barely. "You're a bad liar."

That's all he says and I have nothing to respond with. Technically I am new in town but I have a feeling that's not what he's talking about. It's painfully obvious by my east coast accent that I am most definitely not from here and don't live here either.

We stand in silence for ten minutes. I count it in my head, I'm pretty sure I reach 60 ten times before I glance over to say something more clever like, "Well, you don't look like you're from here either," but he's gone.

He didn't drive off. He didn't go back inside because I would've heard the doors swishing. He didn't walk off.

He's just gone, his vape smoke is still in the air, I can see it.

I decide that I don't love North Dakota just as a woman in a red Monte Carlos pulls up in front of me. "Hey, I'm headed to Fergus Falls. You need a ride?"